Friday, August 06, 2010

Reunion - 25 years? How did that happen?






H


mow on earth did I get old enough to have graduated from high school 25 years ago?

I have no idea. I certainly feel roughly the same - around 18 or 20 years old in my brain forever. I think most people feel that way don't they? And the people who don't feel that way are the people who aren't very much fun to be around!

I really debated going to this reunion. For lots of reasons. You know, sometimes our lives don't turn out exactly the way we had planned, or we don't look exactly the way we had planned (by now I thought I would be a 5 foot 10' ex-model in a size 4 wearing Chanel from head to foot day and night...A bit unrealistic I admit, but you know, when you're 14 and you dream of what you'll be when you're older, these are they types of thoughts you have....)

And then I talked to my closest friends and they all sort of didn't want to go either. For a lot of the same reasons. And they still live close by, I had to travel. Why would I travel kind of far to go to a reunion to announce myself as not having met any sort of impressive potential? It seems like a really dumb idea.

So I was ready to bag the whole thing.This is the funniest guy I went to high school with and his wife, I can't remember ever not knowing him - I think I've known him since I was a baby. And the funniest guy you went to high school with is always the best person to sit across from at the reunion. :)

But then, someone who I really was not friends with in high school (in fact, quite the opposite, I almost sort of thought I kind of maybe didn't even like this person only based on an idea of who I thought they were in hs, which maybe isn't totally fair...but that's high school for you) - this person said to me "Really? That's why you aren't going to go?" And a lot of other things that got me thinking about my attitude about it. If the point of a high school reunion is to go there and impress the heck out of everyone with how perfect your life turned out - not very many people would ever go would they? Because who feels that confident in every aspect of their lives that they want to go for that reason? And if you needed to do that - to go so you could impress everyone you went to high school with - well, that doesn't bode very well for how you feel about yourself anyway does it? So I had start to re-examine my thought process there. And in the end it sort of came down to almost a dare myself to show up kind of situation. Okay, everything isn't perfect, maybe I haven't even met my potential as a person yet - but who cares, most of the other people probably feel the same way. Shouldn't the point be going and having fun and being able to see people you haven't seen for a long time and just being yourself?

So that was my goal. Just go and be yourself. Now that alone was actually a sort of revelation for me. Because honestly? I don't think that many people in high school really knew who I was. Not really. A few close friends really knew who I was - but the rest of them, maybe only knew some aspects of my personality, and the rest of the people probably had some misconceptions about who I was totally.

I'm really glad I went. I had a great time. I laughed a lot. And really? There's nothing better than a good laugh is there? I saw people I hadn't seen in ages, some I was friends with and some I didn't know all that well - but it was fun to talk to everyone I had a chance to talk to. It was oddly therapeutic and it was really good to see that a lot of other people are still trying to figure this thing called "grown up life" out too. And the vast majority of the people I went to school with are really NICE people and that was nice to remember. And nice to feel genuinely cared about.


So that's my recommendation. Take my advice. Go to your class reunion. It'll be good for you. In fact, I had so much fun, I forgot to take photos of everyone that I would have liked to get a photo with, but interspersed here and there are some I did get.

2 comments:

I Am Boymom said...

I remember going to my 10 year reunion and feeling the same way. My 30 year reunion is coming up in a year and a half and I am still struggling with those feelings. Ten years hadn't changed a lot of the people I went to school with at my snobby high school filled with lots and lots of wealthy kids. It will be interesting to see where everybody is after 30 years. Thanks for the insight and the honesty about your trepidations. It's nice to know I'm not the only one who feels a little insecure about being around my old peers. High School has such a weird place in our lives, isn't it?

Bandanamom said...

I would say go Geri - I went to my 10 year and it felt like everyone was still roughly in the same mode. I don't think 10 years is long enough for us to get over ourselves. :) The weird realization that I had at this reunion - as opposed to any that I had gone to before (I skipped the 20, but was at the 5, 10 and 15) was that 1. possibly NO ONE's life has turned out EXACTLY as they planned, but that's okay and 2. people are a lot nicer as they get older or I am a lot less critical of people or something, because suddenly everyone seemed nice.

And you Geri, are a super wonderful person. So I would go and just be GERI, and who can help but like you? You're funny and articulate and okay, maybe everything in life hasn't turned out perfectly, but I bet you could make someone's day by just being your funny self and chatting with them.

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