tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-177748152024-03-13T14:16:36.927-07:00BandanamomCurating Happiness, Searching for Lovely Things, and Occasional Other Thoughts. Bandanamomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00022192424529851823noreply@blogger.comBlogger613125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17774815.post-44418266865003844002020-09-07T19:22:00.000-07:002020-09-07T19:22:06.408-07:00How I spent my summer vacation - Or really the last 6 months <p> <span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; white-space: pre-wrap;">How I spent my Summer Vacation (and really every month since March)</span></p><span id="docs-internal-guid-430ebe16-7fff-7f7a-32ec-cec437717833"><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="border: none; display: inline-block; height: 403px; overflow: hidden; width: 317px;"><img height="403" src="https://lh5.googleusercontent.com/phDS3xyqNlGPmbjyXY-vWhv1AKevpS67v1l1JRb0uIKsYeXVbVGeXM5svXY35Wer1d0oM1KFNnq8VQT6Cdwo43Vpo6b7GF_Gvrd3GhZjcxqZdbJ_Uoak_dm16Dg21I6I37e1FVEa" style="margin-left: 0px; margin-top: 0px;" width="317" /></span></span></p><br /><br /><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">When you feel low grade worry all the time it’s very difficult to do any of things you wish you could do. I have started approximately 30 books and finished almost none of them. I just can’t focus. I give myself the same recommendations I give my clients. Only focus on what you control, let go of what you can’t, know the difference. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Pre-covid almost every Friday night of the world I would go see a movie at the end of my workday. It was the perfect way to transition into a “weekend” (even though now, I almost always also see clients on Saturdays). Sometimes I would go with people, but a lot of the time I would go alone. I have always found that very freeing because I can go to any old weird obscure movie I want and I don’t have to worry about anyone else liking it. When I left the movie and drove home after it would always feel like I was leaving with a fresh perspective and no thoughts of my week/client problems, etc. With this option taken away, it has felt like my main coping skill was also gone. Trying to watch movies at home feels almost impossible. I usually end up watching a tv show I don’t care about very much. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I peruse social media and feel annoyed with a lot of things I see. I take breaks from it, but somehow it often feels like the only connection to the real world outside of work and family that I have. Sometimes it is very hard for me to understand people who seem to not care about politics or people’s lived reality. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">My family has been ill - probably not Covid (though this is still somewhat unclear) but long term illness now going on two months with more than one family member and it is so disheartening. I just want to fix everyone and I want it to be over for them. It is very hard not to feel that always in the back of my mind as something I need to focus on. It has meant trips to the ER and Urgent Care and all of us getting Covid tested and isolating myself at times. Having to cancel client appointments, which always makes me feel guilty. But nothing is more important than my family and if anything this pandemic has made that even more apparent. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">My one sanity has been my pool, swimming and floating and being in the sun until it almost feels like I am hallucinating. I’ve never been so tan except maybe when I was 14. Last night my pool equipment literally blew up. Like an explosion. My son called to me in my room to come and see what was happening. I heard the loud boom. I thought it was a transformer or something. I had taken an Ambien 30 minutes before because I can literally never sleep. So when I walked out there standing in all the water that was running everywhere, all I could think of was that I had just that day been thinking of what a blessing that pool is and how much I love it, and that somehow I blew up that equipment with the power of my mind. Ambien makes me think weird things sometimes. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Other things I fixate on: I have major plumbing problems that need attention but I also don’t have 15K to spend on them so I try praying they won’t be eminently problematic, I need a new roof, I need new flooring, my power bills are crazy this summer. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Sometimes I marco polo with friends and other times I can’t watch them or respond because it feels like too much to explain my thoughts. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Even still with everything on the days I work I see around 8-10 clients. That’s 8-10 hours of focus I need to find within me. I love my job. I love helping people. I love being a therapist. That doesn’t mean it’s easy to provide what is needed right now. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I need my oil changed in my car. I need my tires aligned. I need to buy actual groceries and not just eat tomatoes or takeout salads. I need to clean out my car. I need to follow up on my own medical appointments. I need to clean out drawers and cupboards and the laundry room and 22 other projects. I need to dust. In my spare time it feels like I cannot muster the energy or focus to accomplish these tasks. My dryer has venting issues which makes me feel like I never want to have to tackle laundry because it’s time consuming and expensive to run the dryer 7000 times. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I did get new glasses so that’s a win. Maybe my one win of the whole summer. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Decidedly not a win - I wanted to make my backyard more “cute” and hung italian lights outside and felt like such a genius sweating to death and climbing up on dangerous objects to hang them. Half way through I fell and broke about 60 of them with glass everywhere. I did get all the glass cleaned up so I guess that was a #smallwin. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">What am I even saying? What I am saying is that everything feels like a huge weight and like nothing matters all at the same time and I think the collective stress of so many people is something I can feel deep inside me. And I am not saying that about clients - I can compartmentalize my clients concerns (usually) - but I am saying in the world right now there is collective hurt and difficulty and I can feel that. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Things that still help me: driving all the way to mesa for a diet soda with coconut and raspberry, driving with the music loud especially at night, or just driving period. Watching Trixie Mattel you tube videos. Eating raw tomatoes with expensive feta. Wearing my favorite perfume. Spending time with my kids (and grandkids but this has out of necessity been very limited). Talking to or texting friends. Breathing and meditating. Connecting to my spiritual beliefs. Candles and baths. My pool - basically anything involving water. Sunsets. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I guess what I want you to know is that even though I am feeling all of this - I am still happy. Underneath it all I feel grateful. I know I am lucky to have so many of the things I do have. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I am still ultimately a hopeful and positive person. I like to believe all of this is happening for us - for me, even the worst things. Somehow in the future maybe it will all make more sense.</span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Most of you know I went through a divorce about a decade ago (feels longer and also shorter than that). At the time it seemed like the worst possible thing that could happen to me. I wasn’t able to see how things would ever be okay. But what I learned was - they were. I was okay. And even though I definitely would not have chosen that path for myself or for my kids, I also can see now that there were things I gained. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Someday - maybe we will see all that we gained during this time. Maybe I will see all that I have gained, or my family has gained, and it will all make a little more sense. And maybe by then, my plumbing problems will be all worked out and I’ll be able to turn into a voracious reader again. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">That’s the belief I’m going to hang onto. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><br /></p><br /></span><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-0JLDytTBU3E/X1bquwg8ixI/AAAAAAAAOm8/wVUox4IAZ2QAvKLZlW0IIE1Bf7chTCapgCLcBGAsYHQ/s1544/IMG_7503.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1544" data-original-width="1158" height="320" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-0JLDytTBU3E/X1bquwg8ixI/AAAAAAAAOm8/wVUox4IAZ2QAvKLZlW0IIE1Bf7chTCapgCLcBGAsYHQ/s320/IMG_7503.jpg" /></a></div><br />Bandanamomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00022192424529851823noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17774815.post-83853828703564828742019-12-31T16:59:00.001-08:002019-12-31T16:59:09.988-08:00Best Films of 2019 and Best Films of the Decade So who hasn't been on blogger since 2016 about? (that would be me) and who knows guys, I am always wanting to write more so maybe I will pick it up again. But at the very least I wanted to create a list of films that I really liked in 2019 and then the films I liked best this decade. First of all, I want to say that I feel like maybe 2019 wasn't quite as strong of a year movie wise as some of the previous years. Overall I was a little underwhelmed with the movies this year. However there were some that I really liked and a few that I loved:<br />
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Booksmart: This was probably my favorite - I mean this movie has everything I love to love about a film - smart, funny, (great music), this was enjoyable from start to finish and I've seen it a few times now as a result. The premise is two smart girls who are graduating from high school having spent all their time studying and suddenly realizing all the other kids are getting into great colleges too except they didn't spend all their time studying. They try to spend the night before graduation making up for it. If it sounds formulaic it is in a kind of way, but it also completely turns the usual tropes on their heads and infuses a smart feminist girl centric sensibility on something that may have been done before, making it new and awesome in the process. </div>
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Jo Jo Rabbit: This is a close second for me. How do you make a serious movie about nazi's and nazi youth and still manage to make it funny while packing in some pretty important social commentary? It's not an easy trick. Does having Hitler as an imaginary friend sound funny? Not really, but it definitely is. This movie had some mixed results with some people but I found it to be a very fresh take on a topic that's been explored many times before. </div>
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Us: I honestly liked Get Out more but I thought this second horror installment from Jordan Peele. The thing is it's very hard to describe, but because it did keep me on the edge of my seat, and sent me to google for a few days afterwards looking up all the symbolism I do recommend it if you're into being scared. </div>
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American Factory: I really dig a good documentary, honestly I will scan through the documentary options on netflix, HBO, PBS and Apple for an hour trying to find one I haven't seen that looks good - it might be my favorite go to genre of movie. This one was really great and is available on netflix. The story of what happens when a Chinese company takes over a glass factory (for car glass) in the United States trying to impose Chinese work culture on an American workforce. The result is fascinating. </div>
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Knives Out: This felt like something from a former era of movie making - like a movie I might have seen when I was growing up. I enjoyed a re-vamp of the who-dun-it and the plot was really good as well as the acting. There's some social commentary going on beneath the surface here too, which I also enjoyed picking out. </div>
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Honey Boy: I don't know if you know very much about Shia LeBeouf but this movie is based on his childhood. In the movie Shia actually plays the role of his own father. He wrote this while he was in rehab and filming it was part of his therapy. He found the content so emotionally difficult he could only shoot some of the scenes one time. I think knowing the background of the film and how they shot it makes it more enjoyable, maybe if you didn't care about the backstory it would be less interesting but I really liked it. </div>
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Once Upon a Time in Hollywood: I became interested in this while watching a instagramer from LA share shots of whole streets Tarantino recreated to ensure his 70s Los Angeles was picture perfect. It is amazing the level of detail that went into this. If you don't know anything about the Manson Family or the Tate/LaBianca Murders then this will be a confusing film for you - but for a Manson expert like myself this was a great movie. I did not expect to have such a visceral response to the ending - and I won't spoil it for those who haven't seen it but it is surprising and I found it to be very satisfying (although violent, which I honestly am very squeamish about violence but still liked this). Also Brad Pitt and Leonardo are delish so there's always that too. </div>
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Ad Astra: Oh did someone say Brad Pitt? Yes he is delicious here too. I enjoyed this. It's a quiet exploration of space and the future - but also really just about being human. Beautifully filmed and a great message. If you're into something a little more slow and contemplative, this is a good film. </div>
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Parasite: this was a movie I kept hearing about and looking forward to all year. It did not disappoint. A social satire that really looks at classism and works on multiple levels. I know some people will avoid it because it is a foreign film but I loved it and highly recommend you give a try. It will surprise you. </div>
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The Farewell: I really like Awkwafina and this movie is largely a vehicle for her to shine. Funny and touching at the same time it is a movie about family and culture and complicated dynamics within the process of dying and saying goodbye. That sounds terribly depressing but this movie really isn't at all. </div>
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Gloria Bell: This was another kind of quiet little number that I really loved for it's take on empowerment of the main character who is in her mid life, a divorcee, trying to find happiness and meaning. Maybe because I am also a divorced person in mid life I found this very relatable. I love Julianne Moore and think she's a fantastic actress. </div>
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Knock Down the House: okay guys I know this one might not be that popular with folks who don't like Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez but I LOVEd this. Such an empowering and inspiring film about what the power of the individual with passion to make a change in the system. It made me practically want to run for office I'm telling you. I feel like anyone could be inspired by this even if you don't agree with the politics. Made me cry guys, a lot. </div>
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Marriage Story: This also made me cry A LOT. It's a beautiful film that almost feels like a play. I love Adam Driver and I loved this story. I saw it in the theatre which I am really glad a I had a chance to do - but it is available on netflix even though it's only been out a while. Divorce is horrible. So the subject matter is very serious and sad - but at the same time, I loved how things resolved and I related to a lot of this (again being divorced is it's own kind of thing that makes you a lot more in tune to things married people may not quite understand as well). There's also a fun performance in here by Alan Alda who I really like too. And Lara Dern is great. Just see it. </div>
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Fyre: I am not so much choosing this for the brilliant filmmaking as I am for the jaw dropping idiocy of this whole thing. I was MESMERIZED by this story guys. Fantastic. There's another doc on this topic too that was a Hulu doc (this is the netflix released one) and I watched both to get a better picture of the overall story. And then I went into a google rabbit hole, so any movie that makes me do that is great. </div>
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Little Woods: This might be one a lot of people missed. The acting and the filmmaking is great here. A story about poverty and what some people will do (or have to do) to make a living when there's barely any options. </div>
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And now for my top 10 pics of the DECADE! (but honestly maybe not really I am just going to share 10 movies from the decade I really think you should see if you haven't) </div>
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<br />Bandanamomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00022192424529851823noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17774815.post-41098970979561260642017-01-04T09:42:00.000-08:002017-01-04T09:43:45.424-08:00Best Films of 2016 2016 was a great year for films. Usually I am able to narrow things down to a top 10 or at most a top 15. This year I have a top 27 because I saw that many genuinely great movies this year. There's also a movie on this list technically released in 2015 and that's because I didn't see it until early 2016 so it didn't make last years list and I think it deserves a mention.<br />
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Movies have become an important aspect of my life - they are a way for me to process feelings, learn and understand more about other people, become educated on topics unfamiliar to my every day lived experience, and they help me manage and recognize difficult emotions.<br />
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The Revenant - Director <span class="value">
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I found this to be breathtakingly beautiful. I could almost feel the cold air filling up my lungs. Brutal and intense, Leonardo DiCaprio does an excellent job here, as is often the case with Mr. DiCaprio. The story follows frontiersman Hugh Glass is a roughly based on some actual events. The soundtrack and cinematography are excellent. It's an intense film and I saw it more than once because I found the experience to be that worthy. It's a story about grief, anger, tenacity, and the harsh realities of mother nature. The experience in all can be rather transcendent. <br />
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The Witch - Director Robert Eggers<br />
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Visually Compelling and spare in details, the film is set in puritanical New England cica 1630. It utilizes a sort of nerve wracking tension that builds horrifically throughout the film. The screen itself is quite dark and the tension never really lets up. Every once in a while I really enjoy being scared on the level of a sort of abject terror. Embedded within this terror is interesting exploration of religious fervor and suspicions that exists within a small community. Family loyalties are also explored and tested. If you don't like scary movies, you'll hate this, but otherwise I highly recommend it. <br />
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Creative Control - Benjamin Dickinson<br />
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It's pretty likely you didn't hear about this one. Creative Control is hard to describe, but delves into the ability to create our own virtual worlds. To a certain extent we already live in this world. My twitter feed is not your twitter feed, my google ad suggestions are not your google ad suggestions. My facebook feed reflects only to a certain extent the thoughts and status of my friends, but more often reveals my interests in the way of the news, the ads, the content and the suggestions that more closely align with a reflection of myself. Creative control takes this a step further when it looks at the ability to create a virtual reality peopled with people who live IRL (In real life) but who may appear differently in our virtual world. I enjoyed that this was black and white with some occasional color for emphasis. I like movies that explore new ideas. </div>
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4. Demolition -
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The main message here is that there is some beauty and maybe even redemption in a total breakdown. I feel like this film really did not get the credit it deserves. Gyllenhaal is a great as ever and the movie is smartly done and I thought had a really great message. Following the death of his wife Gyllenhaal has to figure out what matters and in order to do so he has to kind of destroy everything and start from scratch. I found it very refreshing, often funny, and touching.<br />
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5. The Invitation - Karyn Kusama<br />
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So I really liked this - it is more of a thriller and I enjoy a well made thriller. This movie started my crush on my new boyfriend Logan Marshall Green who I think makes a cuter and more cali version of Tom Hardy (who I first noticed last year in Madame Bovary). The premise is the main character and his girlfriend are invited to dinner party being held by his ex wife and her new partner. The invitation is accepted but perhaps suspicious though we aren't really sure initially what is going on and maybe Logan Marshall Green is just being paranoid. That's all I'm going to say so that I don't spoil it. This was another movie that flew under the radar because it was independent and didn't get wide distribution (thank goodness for living in the Phoenix area that we are large enough to get some of these more obscure titles in the theatres). Check it out I think you'll dig it if you like an interesting premise and a sort of edge of your seat experience. (also again, Logan Marshall Green, he's adorable and you'll thank me later for making you aware of his cuteness.) </div>
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6. The First Monday in May - Andrew Rossi </div>
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You guys this was stunning. Every year the Metropolitan Museum of Art does the Met Gala and this is both a fundraiser and an exhibition that goes along with it which is themed - the year that this was filmed the theme was "China: Through the Looking Glass". It is gorgeous feast for the eyes of the exploration of Chines influence on art and fashion through the ages. I've seen this 3 times now and I actually purchased the movie on my Apple Itunes because it's that good. I can't say enough good things about this. This is why fashion should be considered an art form - I really believe for anyone who has ever questioned that premise, this movie should put that to rest. </div>
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7. A Bigger Splash - <span itemprop="name" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box;">Luca Guadagnino</span></div>
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<span itemprop="name" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box;">One day I was randomly looking for a french movie I saw a long time ago and perusing netflix to see if I could find it and some old french film popped up and I actually watched it and it was kind of weird but also kind of great. Then this year I went to this movie and part way through I was like "oh hey wait a minute, I've seen this before" - which was because the old French movie I saw was "La Piscine" (1969) and it is the older version of this movie. If you don't like meandering foreign films where you aren't quite sure what the point is going to be - then this probably isn't meant for you. But if you DO dig those sorts of things, this is great. Basically a character study in what happens when you place 4 people together in on a sun drenched island and sort of watch what kind of chemical reaction you can create out of it. This also made me absolutely fall in love with the island of Pantelleria. I'm so keen on visiting either the Italian or Spanish islands which I think have this great sort of volcanic beauty. The movie is a bit of a meandering journey but I really liked the ride. </span></div>
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<span itemprop="name" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box;">An adorable throw back to the 80s movie that reminds me of everything we loved about 80s romance like Pretty in Pink. That's really all you need to know. Trust me you'll love it. Boy meets girl, boy has big dreams, girl has big dreams, hopeful and cute with heart. </span></div>
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<span itemprop="name" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box;">This was quite a great little movie. A coming of age story about a kid who lives in less than ideal circumstances, who is being bullied, but who himself is probably headed for a stint in juvie if he doesn't make some changes. A story about what a kids world looks like when money is tight and parental supervision is lacking. There's a lot of heart here and a lot of honesty. The lead actor is great and it all seems totally authentic. Ultimately hopeful, it sort of hit me in the feels and lingered. </span></div>
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<span itemprop="name" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box;">10. Holy Hell - Will Allen </span></div>
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This is a very thorough documentary because one of the members of the cult it is about began filming while being a participant in the movement beginning in 1985. The movement was called Buddhafield. It was a spiritual movement and it still exists in some form today. The fascinating thing about this was to try to understand the hold the movement had on its participants which was quite strong. In the beginning everything seemed like rainbows and unicorns but later, it seemed to take a darker turn. Its hard to describe, you sort of have to watch it to really get a feel for what is going on here. My daughter and I have discussed this movie several times and it is genuinely one of the more fascinating documentaries I saw this year.<br />
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11. Keanu - Peter Atencio<br />
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This was the funniest movie I saw this year. These guys were hilarious. I loved the whole silly premise which was too nice dudes who stumble into pretending to be gangsters just to get their cat Keanu back who happens to have been taken by said a local gang. It's a ridiculous premise and it worked wonderfully well at making everything that happens in this movie seem totally plausible in the least plausible way which gives you permission to laugh at everything. </div>
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12. Hell or High Water - David Mackenzie </div>
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Besides the fact that Chris Pine is a thing of beauty, this movie has a lot to offer. This is a well paced tale of two men on the wrong side of the law for what appear to perhaps be the right reasons, although we aren't exactly sure. You find yourself not being certain if we are rooting for the good guys or the bad guys or both. Jeff Bridges superbly portrays an older sheriff here but all the acting is great all the way around. </div>
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13. Other People - Chris Kelly<br />
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Molly Shannon does such a great job here as a woman dying of cancer. The whole premise of this movie - a woman dying of cancer, makes it sound like something you'd rather avoid because who wants to be all depressed about that right? But I loved how this movie explored what it means to really live and then die the right way, and how we can make sure we are living a life that is honest. It's a tear jerker for sure, but in a way that stuck with me and made me feel better for having watched it. There are some great humorous moments in this too that reminded me a lot of the ways in which families are complex things and sometimes the source of our greatest happiness and are greatest pains. <br />
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14. Miss Stevens - Julia Hart<br />
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Miss Stevens is about a group of high school students who go on a weekend trip with their teacher for a drama competition (similar to speech competitions for those familiar). And even though the movie is sort of about that, what the movie is really about is a teacher who is only a biscuit older than her students and how anyone who spends some significant time around teens realizes we never really grow so old that we don't fundamentally relate to being a teenager still. And teens aren't really so young that they can't understand what it means to be a grown up. And there's a lot of fuzzy territory there in between. This one was quiet and I really enjoyed the fact that I never totally knew where the plot was going and it had layers and layers of meaning and goodness that I just completely absorbed like a dose of the best medicine money could buy.<br />
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15. City of Gold - Laura Gabbert<br />
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This is a documentary about a man's love affair with food. It is beautiful. And it is a delicious portrayal of everything that is awesome about the Los Angeles melting pot of neighborhoods and the culinary surprises that result. I should buy this movie so that I can watch it again before I go to Los Angeles next time because it is chock full of wonderful information on where to get all the best LA has to offer. My kids and I watched this together and fully enjoyed and savored every morsel of this film. :)<br />
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16. American Honey - Andrea Arnold<br />
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These kids who sell magazine subscriptions show up my door time and time again and I have never believed their B.S. and have often called them out on it. This movie will do nothing to change the way I react to them when they show up - I'm still not going to buy their magazine subscriptions, however, it will make me remember their humanity a little bit more. I know these kids. These kids are kids who sit in my counseling office from time to time. These kids are the forgotten kids. The kids who dropped out of school because no one cared. Who slipped through all the cracks all the way down to the very bottom and still no one really notices or cares. And they will mostly continue to survive because at the end of the day, you almost can't really break these kids, that's how much resilience that have. Sad but poetic. I loved so many things about this very raw movie. I saw the previews for this film with some friends and one of my friends remarked "that looks horribly depressing" but I had been sitting there watching the same preview thinking "man, I really have to see that movie". It did not disappoint. It was brilliant. Cinematic and acting wise this film was one of the very best I saw all year.<br />
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17. Blue Jay - Alexandre Lehmann<br />
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The acting here is so good. This movie is this quiet little story of two old high school sweethearts who run into each other in the grocery store in their hometown. They haven't seen each other in years and we aren't really sure what to expect. The movie unfolds in this slow dance between the two of them and gradually reveals bits of important information that helps explain why they broke up and why the feelings between the two of them appear to be so strong. I really enjoyed this but it did make me SOB at some points. So if you really hate crying, skip this. But I'm glad I didn't skip it because I thought it was absolutely beautiful. </div>
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18. Moonlight - Barry Jenkins </div>
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This was hands down my favorite movie this year. It was just so beautiful. The story is told in three parts like a symphony or a play, the film itself is gorgeous, and the story touches on themes of race, poverty, sexuality, and isolation. The story is a very unique one and to some extent defies simple description. The director uses a lot of metaphor and symbolism and it gave the movie a depth that allowed me to see it twice while still wishing to watch it again. A movie like this proves what potential movies have to give us insight and meaning. Truly a piece if art. </div>
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19. The Handmaid - Chan-wook Park </div>
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This movie was just flat out gorgeous. The story was interesting with tricky plot twists and kept me totally engaged, but even if the story had been awful, the images on the screen and set direction would still have been worth watching. </div>
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20. Noctural Animals - Tom Ford </div>
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So the last movie Tom Ford directed was "A Single Man" and it was a beautiful and sad experience to watch, but in a good way. This story and the tone is a little different, but I enjoyed it very much. A Single Man felt more quiet and contemplative whereas this movie is more in the vein of a thriller. As always, Tom Ford dazzles with interesting imagery and an eye for incredible detail. </div>
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21. Arrival - Dennis Villeneuve</div>
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Two Amy Adams movies in a row here. What I loved about this is I don't even particularly like alien type movies and I found this one so unique and great. The message of this movie above all else was very heartening and uplifting. Amy Adams does a great job and this movie has a beauty that I really enjoyed as well. Even if you're normally not much interested in an "alien" film, I recommend you give this a shot. </div>
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22. The Lobster - Yorgos Lanthimos </div>
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You guys this was weird and good. I saw it more than once because I really wanted to totally understand all aspects of this and I felt I missed some things the first time. The premise of this movie is that being single is totally unacceptable. You MUST have a partner. If not, you probably shouldn't live as a human and should be an animal instead. The total weirdness of this is just too difficult to explain but it makes some very funny criticism of the culture of dating/marriage and placing such a high premium on being with someone. It seems to equally criticize those who think being in a relationship is a waste of time or anathema to having a fulfilling and important life. I guarantee this movie won't bore you. </div>
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23. Jackie - Pablo Larrain</div>
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This was such a powerful film. First of all, Natalie Portman does an amazing portrayal of Jackie Kennedy. Secondly, the focus on the timing between the assassination of President Kennedy and the funeral and Jackie's hyper focus on the optics of it all is a fascinating way to approach this topic. This movie helped to contextualize so much about the Kennedy legacy and to really put myself in Jackie's shoes. I thought it was amazing. </div>
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24. La La Land - Damien Chazelle </div>
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This was crazy good. I loved everything about it. Ryan Gosling continues to be the best boyfriend anyone could ever have. I loved the chemistry between him and Emma Stone. The songs from this movie have been stuck in my head every since I saw it. No one really makes musicals like this anymore and the director figured out a way to do it and pay homage to musicals of old while still keeping it fresh. That's tricky but it worked out wonderfully well.<br />
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25. Manchester by the Sea - Kenneth Longergan <br />
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You guys this is really sad. But SO good. Casey Affleck does an amazing job. It's heartwarming and not totally depressing in every single way - but fair warning, it is FAIRLY depressing. One of the people I attended this with was pretty much clinically upset afterwards. Still one of the best movies of the year.<br />
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26. Elle - Paul Verhoeven<br />
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This is the same director did Basic Instinct - and this film has a similar darkness. This was a completely new take on a sort of old idea - the idea of how sexual assault may impact a powerful woman. Some aspects of this I never saw coming and I found it fascinating how the director played around with this theme. I love a good french film. Isabelle Huppert is a great actress and really makes this film work.<br />
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27. Lion - Garth Davis<br />
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This was a gorgeous movie with so much heart. Based on a true story of a boy in India who became lost and eventually finds his family many years later. That premise sounded like a thin one to create an entire feature film around but believe me, this is a movie that will engage you from beginning to end.<br />
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I know! 27 movies! That I gave 5 stars each to this year. It's a crazy amount. Also that seems like a lot of movies to see! But I do love movies you guys. There's almost nothing I would rather do on the weekend than see a movie if I can. I also lucked out this year with many gifted movie tickets and that made my movie watching a lot more doable.<br />
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There are a few movies that I wanted to see in 2016 that I wasn't able to see too so I am hoping to catch up on some of those soon. 20th Century Women doesn't start here for a couple more weeks and I think it looks excellent based on the trailers. Here's to more great films in 2017.<br />
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<br />Bandanamomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00022192424529851823noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17774815.post-3810899156279226892016-10-15T18:46:00.001-07:002016-10-15T18:46:08.411-07:00Playing it as it Lays8 minute memoir<br />
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Messes<br />
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One time I was such an emotional mess I stayed in bed and cried for days on end. I got up to run my kids to school and back and that was it. That's all I could do. <br />
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One time I was such an emotional mess I would drive through Culvers for dinner almost every night and get a tuna fish sandwich because that was all I could think of to eat. <br />
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One time I was such an emotional mess I felt the skin on my arms burning from within. It felt like wearing my nerves on the outside of my skin. Anything touching me felt painful. <br />
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One time I was such an emotional mess I would wake up from dreams where people put guns to my head and pulled the trigger. I would wake up when I died.<br />
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One time I was such an emotional mess that almost any song on the radio could make me cry.<br />
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One time I was such an emotional mess and it felt like it would never get any better.<br />
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I would drive and drive all over the city and I felt like Maria Wyeth in Play it As It Lays. I was staring in my own Joan Didion novel. <br />
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: Merriweather, Georgia, serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">“I know what "nothing" means, and keep on playing.” </span><br style="color: #181818; font-family: Merriweather, Georgia, serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: Merriweather, Georgia, serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">― </span><a class="authorOrTitle" href="https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/238.Joan_Didion" style="color: #333333; font-family: Lato, 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-weight: bold; text-align: left; text-decoration: none;">Joan Didion</a><span style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: Merriweather, Georgia, serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">, </span><span id="quote_book_link_428" style="color: #181818; font-family: Merriweather, Georgia, serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;"><a class="authorOrTitle" href="https://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/4703" style="color: #333333; font-family: Lato, 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, sans-serif; font-weight: bold; text-decoration: none;">Play It as It Lays</a></span></div>
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So I just kept on. <br />
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There's a lot of wisdom in a Joan Didion novel. Sometimes you have to just keep going. <br />
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<br />Bandanamomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00022192424529851823noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17774815.post-24196114920304582632016-10-08T14:07:00.003-07:002016-10-08T14:07:43.195-07:00Exactly why I'm with "Her"Twice in the past couple of months friends of mine who are conservative have asked an honest question about if I am supporting Hillary Clinton and why. In both cases I didn't really want to get into a long conversation about it because I really don't like to disagree over politics with family and friends. That may sound surprising to some people because I certainly <b>have </b>been known to have strong feelings about politics and I certainly have at times gotten into a heated discussion about them. <br />
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This blog post is an attempt to answer those questions more fully for anyone who might be interested. <br />
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First off, I think I have to make it clear that my vote for Hillary is not just a vote against Donald Trump. Yes, it is also that - I can't imagine having Donald Trump as our President. I don't think I need to go into all of the reasons why. Donald Trump is a well-documented huckster and prone to saying things a reasonable person can only conclude are sexist, racist and xenophobic. Enough said about that guy. That's a whole other discussion. <br />
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I am voting for Hillary for the following reasons:<br />
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Because Meryl Streep likes her and Meryl Streep is my favorite. </div>
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Kidding! This is not why! </div>
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These are the real reasons why: </div>
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1. Hillary Clinton is incredibly qualified. I highly recommend the <span style="color: red;"><span style="color: red;"><a href="http://www.pbs.org/video/2365848966/" target="_blank">PBS Frontline Documentary</a></span> </span>on both candidates if you haven't watched it yet. It goes into very great detail on her early years and all of her achievements, etc. (it covers Trumps as well). She was raised in a conservative household. After she graduated from high school Hillary Clinton attended Wellesley. While there she was part of the young republicans for time. I relate to this because I started out in college believing I was a republican but the more I studied politics the more I realized my heart could never reconcile some conservative belief with my more liberal tendencies. Hillary has said the Vietnam War and Civil Rights Movement changed her political views. She's always been a hard worker and been involved in politics both as a republican and as a democrat since she was very young. She attended Yale Law School after graduating from Wellesley with honors. She took an early interest in child abuse cases and the problems of migrant workers. She worked for the Children's Defense Fund. She later became a partner at a law firm and the first lady of Arkansas. She was a law professor at the University of Arkansas. She became the first lady of the United States, a senator in New York and then the Secretary of State. I honestly don't think anyone can top these qualifications. </div>
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2. She has supported causes I believe are important. As mentioned above the defense of vulnerable children has always been something she has cared about. She's been a big supporter of the 9/11 first responders. She cares about health care and has advocated for reform. She's credited with launching the Children's Health Care Insurance Program. She's advocated for human rights across the world and has promoted diplomacy. She advocated for the Lilly Ledbetter Pay Equality act and helped get it pushed into law. She's advocated for women. She's advocated for paternity leave for men. </div>
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3. <a href="https://www.hillaryclinton.com/issues/" target="_blank"><span style="color: red;">Her policy plans</span> </a>are things I mostly agree with. I believe it's unrealistic to look for a candidate you're going to agree with 100% of the time. My views line up with hers about 95% of the time and that makes me feel pretty comfortable. </div>
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And now to address familiar concerns raised by others: </div>
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1. Bengazi. There have been $7 million dollars spent on Benghazi investigations. There are 1,982 pages of published reports on Benghazi. There have been 10 hearings. There has been no evidence of Clinton or her administration doing anything wrong. There was no "stand down" call. It has never been found to be true. <span style="color: red;"><a href="http://www.newyorker.com/news/news-desk/chris-stevenss-family-dont-blame-hillary-clinton-for-benghazi" target="_blank">The family of Chris Stevens who was killed in the siege on Benghazi have asked people to quit blaming Clinton.</a></span></div>
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<span style="color: red;"><span style="color: black;">Additionally I have never understood the obsession over this when there were 13 attacks on US embassies under the Bush administration and 60 people were killed. </span></span></div>
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<span style="color: red;"><span style="color: black;">2. The emails. Again with the emails. Look. I think her having the emails on a private server was probably dumb. BUT the way the government was handling emails on both sides of the aisle was equally dumb. Colin Powell did something incredibly similar. General David Patraeus, while he was the director of the CIA gave his mistress a series of black books that contained actual classified information. Patraeus admits this. And yet at the time the Republicans (like John McCain) said "everyone makes mistakes sometimes". And they called the scrutiny "silly". Even though Patraeus first lied about it before coming clean. With the emails Clinton sent that were suppose to be Classified you need to understand emails may be classified as such at 'inception' but they can retroactively be categorized that way - many of the Clinton emails that were brought up as "classified" were only later to be considered as such. <span style="color: red;"><a href="http://www.newsweek.com/hillary-clinton-email-scandal-not-scandal-464414" target="_blank">Please read this article if you really want a good purview of why the scandal really shouldn't be - it explains it a lot better than I'm going to be able to.</a></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: red;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="color: red;"><span style="color: black;">There are 16 volumes of information on how administrative functions should occur in regards to Clinton's office as Secretary of State and minutia like how emails should be handled. Yes, maybe someone should have been charged with making sure everything was being done correctly. But my reading of the situation is that it was a cluster fugazy to try to figure out what was allowed and what wasn't. Honestly please, if this issue really bothers you, please go read the article I linked from Newsweek. By the way - have you read any of the emails? I have. They made me like her so much more! In her emails she comes across as someone caring, who takes time to writes nice notes to people, to tell people congrats, to ask funny questions, she's a tough negotiator, she worries about people. These are qualities I want in a leader of our country! She's also inadverntently funny at times in some of those emails which reminded me a little of Selena Meyers on "The Veep". That also makes me like her. </span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: red;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="color: red;"><span style="color: black;">3. Everyone loves to call her a liar. Look, I think it's pretty unrealistic to believe anyone in politics is able to be 100% honest all the time. I don't care who we are talking about. I published this chart on my fb page and some conservatives thought it was a crazy chart.</span></span></span></span></div>
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People really questioned this and so let me clarify in case you saw this and wondered how valid it could be. The data came from an open source - it wasn't manipulated. Politifact did the fact checking and they are non-partisan. Donald Trump had a total of 202 statements who Politifact had rated. These were all statements made during his campaign. Hillary Clinton had 225 rated - hers were rated beginning 2007 and covers her time as a previous candidate for president and this go-round. These statements can also been checked by The Washington Post and FactCheck.org which both also check validity of statements made. Trump loves to call Hillary a liar but this does not actually make her a liar. Jill Abramson said she has launched multiple investigations into Hillary, her business dealings and her fundraising as well as her foundation. Abramson has been a bur in the side of the Clinton's at times because she has investigated them so much and yet, she has said "Hillary Clinton is fundamentally honest and trustworthy". Hillary Clinton has been hated by the right since the time that her husband ran for President. The idea has been floated that she is a "liar" since before the internet was even really a thing. It feels like a witch hunt that is never going to end. It feels incredibly unfair to me. The more I've investigated myself into old scandals like Whitewater and looked at old articles the more I've come to believe this is an accusation waged against her forever with no actual evidence to back it up that amounts to anything that would sway my vote. </div>
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Did you know that Republicans once spent 140 hours investigating the White House Christmas Card List when the Clintons were in the white house? There has been an exhaustive constant search for "scandals". </div>
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4. Money and her speeches. The speeches pretty well got released yesterday. Did you read through them? I did. Nothing to see here folks. Honestly again, I thought they were mostly well said and balanced views that align pretty well with what is probably a realistic approach to government, politics and the private sector and how they have to dovetail. But let's talk about the money. The talking fees. She has earned about $200,000 or more for a single speech. That seems crazy to a lot of people. Okay but that is a well established and long standing way for people in the public eye to make money. Paris Hilton has been paid $750,000 to show up for a party. Even lower level celebrities get paid small fees for showing up at events and openings. Other people who get paid just as much as Hillary? Guy Fieri (right - the food network guy), "Larry the Cable Guy", and Michael Phelps. Speaking Engagements as a job is a thing and it has been a thing for a long time. Many former presidents and first ladies have made a tidy sum in retirement on the speaking circuit. Jeb Bush has made millions of dollars in paid speeches. Corporations pay for speakers all the time. Donald Trump has been paid 1.5 million before for public engagements. Why is she being held to a different standard that literally anyone else? </div>
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<br />Is Hillary Clinton perfect? No of course not. But I believe is by far and by a wide margin the best possible candidate. Which is why...</div>
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Bandanamomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00022192424529851823noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17774815.post-26574269045279430592016-10-05T10:10:00.001-07:002016-10-05T10:30:11.386-07:00Love Notes to myself on my Birthday 8 minute memoir - <b>Birthdays </b><br />
<br />
<br />
Birthdays always feel like a complicated affair for me. It's really nice to have a day that other people acknowledge as a special day you were born and yet somehow that's always a little uncomfortable for me too. Birthdays have often been this weird let down kind of feeling for me - even when I was much younger, and I've never been able to explain where that comes from really. I've gotten into fights with friends on my birthday. I've cried after leaving a birthday celebration. I really related to Betheny Frankel when she spent her birthday crying in the bathroom at an extravagent party. It's never been the fault of anyone - but it's always just felt like a very strangely disappointing day. <br />
<br />
This year on my work calendar I noticed on July 27th it said "<b>take off this day if you still work here</b>". I made that little note on the calendar a year earlier. I remember that birthday, when I turned 48 was a particularly trying day for me. It was a day filled with stress, both personal stress and stress at work. And I remember when I finally got around to going to dinner with 2 of my kids that evening I just felt like that birthday was more stressful than most and hence, the next day I made this nice little mental note and calendar note to take off my birthday next time it came around.<br />
<br />
As July approached I didn't delete the note to myself but I also did not plan to take off that day. It seemed silly and wasteful to use one of my vacation days on a day when actually, I probably didn't have much to do to celebrate anyway. Besides, who celebrates 49?<br />
<br />
But every day in July when I logged into my calendar and scanned my appointments, there that little reminder sat blinking away at me. It sort of taunted me. I thought about deleting it, but I couldn't quite make it go away. It felt like if I deleted it 48 year old me from 2015 was going to be pretty irritated with 2016 me.<br />
<br />
Finally, the week before I turned 49 I arranged to have the day off.<br />
<br />
It was the best decision of my life. Okay, that's a little hyberbolic, it was a good decision. The best decision of my life was deciding to have kids. My kids have always made my birthdays really great. I think it's just me that's always overthinking on my birthday. Having the day off this year helped me to not overthink it. I went with the flow. Jordan and I got crêpes. I did a little shopping. I got a pedicure. I went to dinner with my kids and had a delicious burger.<br />
<br />
Here's the thing. I actually think I do know the reasons my birthdays are complicated affairs for me. And it's more than I want to divulge in an 8 minute memoir. Maybe you have complicated feelings about your birthdays too. Lots of people do.<br />
<br />
What I know for sure is when July 27, 2017 rolls around I will be taking that day off too. I already made a note. I'll be floating in my pool, having lunch with someone I love, or eating a Sprinkles cupcake. Whether I'm alone or with other people the secret is this - just be nice to yourself that day. I'm the one who has been screwing up my birthdays this whole time. I'm guessing that's why birthdays feel great when you're 1 - you're too young to get in your own way of having a great time. <br />
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Bandanamomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00022192424529851823noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17774815.post-64890811762030605982016-09-24T18:43:00.000-07:002016-09-24T20:24:45.577-07:00Tag and other Torture 8 minute memoir<br />
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<br />
I'm way behind on these but what else is new?<br />
<br />
<br />
Being 8 years old.<br />
<br />
eight. I barely remember it and yet I remember it all. I remember eight was maybe the first time I felt truly bullied at school. It's not a fun memory but it happened a lot that year. It caused me to get in a fight, to slap a girl across the face and to be sent to the principals office. The principal was actually on my side in the whole thing so I really didn't get in too much trouble. She gave the other girl a lecture about pushing people too far. In that scenario I was people. She had a big ol beehive. It was 1975 and that was probably kind of out of style by then, but not in my little small town.<br />
<br />
My school was a super small country school so our principal was also my teacher that year. Mrs. McCullough. I thought she was pretty keen. But one day she made me stay in at recess because I couldn't count the little stack of coins she gave us and get the right answer. I kept counting the nickels and dimes wrong because I thought the bigger coins should be worth more than the tiny ones. So I guess that was also my first experience of being dead wrong and someone calling me out on it. She sat at her desk grading papers. I felt a slow panic about missing out on lunch. Missing out on lunch meant I'd probably get left out when I finally got there and probably left out at lunch recess too. The panic did nothing to improve my counting skills. She kept saying "you'll get it, try again". She seemed to know I really wanted her to just rescue me from the torture and I was being pretty dramatic about the whole thing and she wasn't having it. I finally got the right answer but it was probably the beginning of a long and worrying relationship with math. <br />
<br />
I wore a lot of polyester back then and spandex like material. Our school had bats in the attic that would occasionally make their way down in the hallways. We had delicious lunches with fluffy rolls and yummy mashed potatoes and gravy and peanut butter bars that were to die for. I had a best friend I fought with all the time. I feel unsettled when I think about most of my elementary school years. I don't know exactly why. I just felt a low level of anxiety a lot. I hated sports and I was terrible at the types of things they're always encouraging 8 year olds to do. Playing kickball or tag is not very fun when you are a slow runner. You're always letting down your team or "it" during tag, which gets real old. That year someone made fun of how I ran and that pretty much put me off running for the rest of my life too. I mean, not really, but yeah, kinda. I blamed it on the fact that I was always wearing fancy little black patent leather shoes most of the time. Then the same kid made fun of me all year for saying that it was because of my shoes. I was always trying to not get messed up and stay pristine. I was prissy in the sort of annoying way when kids don't like getting their clothes messed up. I was more the kind of kid you'd find sitting under a tree reading Little House on the Prairie or Trixie Belden. That doesn't usually count for much when you're 8. Other eight year olds don't exactly admire that as a <br />
skill.<br />
<br />
<br />
I wanted to be a writer when I grew up and I sent away to one of those
things in the back of a magazine that tells you if you have promise or
not. They sent back and said I showed a lot of promise and I should
sign up for classes. I'd imagine they were pricey correspondence
courses. I was just pretty thrilled they liked my stuff. I had written
a story about a little girl and Christmas called "Lydia's Christmas". I
didn't know anyone named Lydia so I was pretty impressed with my
creativity. Imagine my surprise when my mom wasn't too keen on that
plan. WHAT? But they said I had talent mom. <br />
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<br />Bandanamomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00022192424529851823noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17774815.post-78514624522934161852016-09-08T23:01:00.002-07:002016-09-08T23:01:59.125-07:00Cakes are done, people are finished. <b>8 minute memoir </b><br />
<b><br /></b>
<b>Finish </b><br />
<br />
<br />
Would you like to know the definition of deep existential angst? It is having 433 books on my "to read list". It is having 140 movies currently on my "movies to see" list. It is knowing I would like to see Greece, Versailles, Ibiza, and Bali before I die. And that's just for starters. It is knowing there are states inside the United States I haven't been to yet. It is knowing I have secret deep desire to stay in the Chateau Marmont someday when the minimum of $500 a night isn't going to make my little debit card cry. I mean, sometimes I stare at Pinterest and just pin and pin and pin places I'd like to go, outfits I would wear if I were thinner, jewelry I would buy if money were no object, couches I would just die to own, and I just create longer and longer lists of things I'll probably never finish.<br />
<br />
Will I really make my own lavender vanilla sugar scrub? Will I really paint pumpkins and arrange flowers inside of them? Will I ever actually make the peach cobbler in the crock pot? Would I paint my front door hot pink?<br />
<br />
The thing is, I never really can say for sure. <br />
<br />
Here is what I do know. I finished my bachelor's degree at 45 years old. I've repainted my front door from white to green to black to red. I finished my Master's degree at 48 years old. I painted some walls in my house black even though there were a lot of naysayers (they were wrong.) Who knows what I will do? My unfinished list of books is 433 long but my finished list is 722 and that probably isn't every book I ever read. I finished all the seasons of Mad Men like I was in a fever dream one summer. <i>One never knows what one can accomplish when we decide to do it, even if that "it" is finally watching all the Audrey Hepburn movies you missed. </i>I am kind of likely to take up yoga. I may take up running (I mean, probably <b>not</b>, but the point is you never <b>know</b> for sure.)<br />
<br />
There are lots of things I'll probably never finish. Things you will probably never finish. But there are lots and lots of things that you should at least consider finishing, because otherwise, what is the point really?<br />
<br />
My Senior English teacher Mrs. Barton used to say all the time "Cakes are done, people are finished." I am neither done, nor finished, just yet.<br />
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<br />Bandanamomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00022192424529851823noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17774815.post-35654354154446766742016-09-03T13:45:00.002-07:002016-09-03T13:45:43.453-07:00Magical Thinking Games <b>8 minute memoir</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
<b>Games</b><br />
<br />
It is possible there is no group more predisposed to magical thinking than teenage girls. <br />
<br />
When you hear the song on the radio - you know the one - the special one that makes you think about that cute boy you like - you know the one - the one with the slow smile and the tan muscular arms - or the one who always wears his football jersey and seems kind of shy - or the one with the flashy car and and the deep hazel eyes - or the one who made you laugh that time in science class. <br />
<br />
When the song comes on you have to start driving as fast as you can. Or as fast as you dare without getting a ticket while you are driving your moms Thunderbird, or your moms Chevrolet. You start driving as fast as you can to the street where they live, to the house you know so well, you practically know how many bricks tall it is, you know the petunias are slightly wilting in the late summer heat, you know the dad might be out front with his hose and you hope - you really really hope he won't be there because if he is you'll have to drive by so fast that you won't be able to really check out the house, to see if his car might be in the driveway, to see if the window that you are pretty sure is his is possibly offering a glimpse or even just a shadow that might be him. <br />
<br />
The game is this - if you can get to his house before the song ends, if you can drive by his house while it is still playing, it is the best of Omens. It is the omen that says all those times you stared at his arms during class, all those times you listened for his name on the radio while the game was broadcast, all those times you melted when he smiled at you, all those times you thought for sure you were going to be the future Mrs. Football, the future Mrs. Deep Hazel Eyes, the future Mrs. Electric Guitar Player, the future Mrs. Science Partner, the future Mrs. Yellow Convertible - all those times are destined to come true. <b> </b><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">This was our attempt at a version of punk rock band called "hot rash"</td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br /></td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">In our more usual state as nice mormon girls</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-OYgoWwJECMk/V8s1VArY1WI/AAAAAAAAOZI/rn-TrprqaGcE8BIrlkSpvpPfgQ2DmoalgCLcB/s1600/IMG_8172.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="216" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-OYgoWwJECMk/V8s1VArY1WI/AAAAAAAAOZI/rn-TrprqaGcE8BIrlkSpvpPfgQ2DmoalgCLcB/s320/IMG_8172.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">when your parents say you are too young to date so you all go to the 9th grade dance together </td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">when you decide to all be in the "future homemakers of America" club</td></tr>
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<br />Bandanamomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00022192424529851823noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17774815.post-64539072761188460592016-08-27T23:43:00.002-07:002016-08-27T23:43:57.305-07:008 minute list of happiness 8 minute memoir writing prompt<br />
<br />
<b>Little Things</b>:<br />
<br />
I'm always saying this and I know it sounds <i>so cliche</i> but it really is the little things that make us happy. Several years ago I went through a rough patch and it was hard to feel really happy. I think I did a pretty good job of focusing on the things that would move me forward. But there were definitely days when I just didn't feel like doing that at all. And sometimes the smallest things would help pull me out of that. I began keeping a list of little things that cheered me up on a bad day. Here's a partial list:<br />
<br />
Sea glass I found on a beach<br />
<br />
The film Amelie<br />
<br />
A poem<br />
<br />
Teenager who smiled at me<br />
<br />
Fresh cut grass<br />
<br />
Fortune cookies<br />
<br />
Smell of Coconut<br />
<br />
Smell of Cinnamon<br />
<br />
Saltwater<br />
<br />
A warm breeze<br />
<br />
Peonies<br />
<br />
My dogs<br />
<br />
Quiet afternoons<br />
<br />
French pop music<br />
<br />
Swimming pool<br />
<br />
Mason jar full of water and ice<br />
<br />
campfire sparks<br />
<br />
Deep indigo skies before a rain storm<br />
<br />
Desert plants<br />
<br />
Big white fluffy clouds<br />
<br />
bright red lipstick<br />
<br />
worn out black converse<br />
<br />
Andy Warhol<br />
<br />
Documentary about Anna Wintour<br />
<br />
Bees<br />
<br />
Tuna Fish<br />
<br />
Diet Coke<br />
<br />
Pineapple<br />
<br />
Practicing French<br />
<br />
Driving with the windows down<br />
<br />
Fat Babies<br />
<br />
Short Cuts<br />
<br />
Mad Men<br />
<br />
Charlie Hunnam<br />
<br />
laughing<br />
<br />
Kate McKinnon<br />
<br />
secrets<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
That's my 8 minute list. One thing I learned in keeping track of the little things that made me happy in a given day was that there are so many things that do make me happy. Even on days when everything is terrible. <br />
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<br />Bandanamomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00022192424529851823noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17774815.post-12850677885112531472016-08-24T22:23:00.001-07:002016-08-24T22:32:42.573-07:00Jade Dragons, Ghosts, Fecund Earth and Mummy Mountain 8 minute memoir writing prompt: Adventures<br />
<br />
<b>Adventures</b><br />
<br />
Let me tell you about a few adventures I have had in my life and they all happened in my Prius. I love my Prius because when you drive you can't hear anything at all. I feel very stealthy. <br />
<br />
I drove to San Francisco by myself with two of my kids. I parallel parked in China Town. I wandered around City Lights bookstore and then I ran up the street to my car again when the meter threatened, past the ducks hanging in the windows, past the little green jade dragons, and past the smells of gingered food. I fed my meter and walked back down and looked around that bookstore until I found the perfect book. We drove up down and all around that town. I found a parking spot right in front of Ben & Jerry's at the intersection of Haight and Ashbury and I parallel parked there like a champ too.<br />
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I drove to Tucson and attended a conference and in my off time I drove around the desert roads and found The Mission San Xavier Del Bac. I was there all alone. I hiked up to the little hill and sat on a stone and breathed in a wonderful amount of creosote. Creosote so delicious is almost smelled the tiniest bit like coconut mixed with creosote. It was heavenly. Then I started wondering if that was a ghost. I really did. Sometimes I smell weird things that shouldn't be there and think about things like that.<br />
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My little Prius carried me and my kids all the way to Idaho on familiar roads and byways. I rolled down the window when I got into the upper valley and it was almost midnight. I could smell soil. Rich, earthy, wet dirt, and it did smell just like home. The air hung with the scent of well watered fields and dank growth and it felt kind of magical. Summer nights in Idaho are full of stars you can actually see, earth you can smell, and quiet.<br />
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Sometimes when I can't go anywhere far my Prius carries me around the back side of Mummy Mountain. My daughter and I drive up and down the little drives with the windows rolled down and our favorite Spotify lists on repeat. We sneak up on Javelinas. We dodge cotton tail bunnies. We wonder how people make their multi-million dollars. We chose the house we would buy if we had a billionaires budget. We also choose the smaller houses. The little haciendas. The house that was built in the 60s. The house with the lovely brick and stone paths. The ones probably no one would pick. We love it when it starts to Monsoon and you can feel the electricity in the air. My Prius climbs up the side of Camelback Mountain and we feel like we're on top the world. Or at least on top of this world.<br />
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<br />Bandanamomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00022192424529851823noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17774815.post-21197338885354021892016-08-22T23:59:00.002-07:002016-08-22T23:59:28.631-07:00Billboards 8 minute writing prompt: Billboards<br />
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<b>Billboards </b><br />
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The Arizona freeways have very few billboards. I like that. When I travel through Utah I see a lot of billboards for plastic surgery for some reason. When I travel through Las Vegas I see a lot of women who have already had plastic surgery in very small outfits trying to advertise the casinos and shows. Women's bodies, when I come to think of it, occupy a lot of space in advertising.<br />
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I have such mixed and complicated feelings about how much space women's bodies should occupy in our collective economy, space, and conversation. Although I think it has become more complicated to be a male recently, I still think those expectations pale in comparison to being a woman. Women think about their bodies, food, clothing sizes, desirability, beauty products, and ways they can control all of these things to an astonishing degree. Wraps, eye creams, Botox, vitamins, vaginoplasty, waxes, steams, tucks, tattoo makeup, and implants. Weight watchers, Jenny Craig, Nutri-System, Diet Center, LA Weightloss, Curves, Modified Starving Fast, and fricking Slim Fast. Think about all the ways we keep women occupied. And broke.<br />
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I have dieted, lasered, surgically altered, starved, and binged. I have purchased expensive creams meant to make me immortal. I bought the spanx, drank the lemon with cayenne, and did more than one water aerobics class into the night.<br />
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And you know what? I still occupy way too much space. And I still don't occupy the right proportion of space to ever be one of the women on the Billboard.<br />
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Sometimes I think maybe that's something to be grateful for.<br />
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And sometimes I re-read my copy of intuitive eating again and just try to get it right. <br />
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<br />Bandanamomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00022192424529851823noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17774815.post-83392110110426978482016-08-19T20:42:00.002-07:002016-08-19T20:42:47.438-07:00Packing Babies Away In Cotton 8 minute writing prompt (in case you missed the prior post I'm doing this <a href="http://anndeeellis.com/category/8mm/" target="_blank">thing</a>) ~<br />
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I<b> don't remember</b>:<br />
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I don't remember every day of each one of my children's childhoods. I sure wish that I did. I wish there was a way to lock up every memory of every day. I would have packed them up in little boxes like the ones from Tiffany's. I would have packed each of those memories in tight with lots of cotton and tissue so that nothing could escape. I'd have closets full of them. Just so that I could now unpack them and experience each one of them anytime I liked. <br />
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I wish I could go back for a 24 hour period and revisit my children as babies and toddlers. I would hold them all day long. I would smell their sweet little baby heads and I would rock them and snuggle and I wouldn't talk to anyone else all day long except them. I would stare into their eyes and I would know who they were going to be and it would be so gratifying and perfect. Because in that moment there would be no worries, and no fears. I would quit being hard on myself for not being a good enough mom, I would believe that everything I was going to do, even though it would be chock full of mistakes and glaring errors, would still be pretty darn good. For one perfect 24 hour period everything would be bliss. <br />
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I suppose I want to do this because so much of what I remember about their babyhoods and childhoods ends up with me thinking about the low level of insecurity I had at the time about not doing it quite as well as I would like. I wanted to be the mom who baked cakes from scratch, read to them every day, limited tv (or eliminated it altogether), played at the park, and always answered every question with love and thoughtfulness. <br />
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Instead more than likely I was making frozen chicken nuggets, running out of ketchup again, scrubbing magic marker off the baby's belly, and rushing everyone off on a last minute errand and no one can find shoes because I am not organized enough to always know where the dang shoes are at all times. Probably they are outside underneath the slowly deteriorating trampoline which some people probably think is dangerous for my children to play on because it doesn't even have proper bumper pads anymore and the springs are looking pretty sketchy. <br />
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But now from my present position, I look back on that momma with a lot of compassion, and in fact, admiration for a job well done. I wish my memories were more of all the things I might have done right. But more than anything I would just love to remember every little thing about every day all over again. <br />
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<br />Bandanamomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00022192424529851823noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17774815.post-38939366269813433392016-08-17T20:18:00.002-07:002016-08-19T20:45:52.232-07:00And then I quit writing but I thought maybe I'd fix that now. So about the time graduate school happened my blog became a sort of thing of the past. And I very much have missed writing. So I created goals for myself to write more, read more, social media less and a bunch of other ways I'm trying to balance out my life. Then I happened upon a <a href="http://anndeeellis.com/" target="_blank">writing challenge wherein there is a prompt</a> and then you set your timer for 8 minutes and just write. And so this is my first attempt. <br />
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<b>I remember: </b><br />
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I remember when I was 17 years old and there was a specific
moment in time when while taking a bath in my white porcelain tub and staring
down at my thighs and feet popping out of the water.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I remember thinking that this moment was a
moment I should remember.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was on the
cusp of graduating and still a kid but almost an adult.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I had spent the majority of my junior and
senior year of high school in a kind of funk and depression about life.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I remember thinking for the first time, in a
very long time, that maybe I could get past the depression. </div>
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<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I can barely remember
now what all the reasons for the depression were.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I think they had to do with fitting in, with
being enough, and believing I wasn’t enough of any of the right things and too
many of the wrong things.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In that moment
in the bathtub I had some moment of clarity. I remember feeling the depression
sort of lifting away from my body and melting into the tub with the bubbles and
the water and eventually circling the drain as I got out.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Even though I don’t remember or even any
longer understand all the reasons why I was depressed, I remember that it felt
very overwhelming at the time.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The tenor
and magnitude of the depression is still a vivid memory for me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It felt like a secret burden I carried around
with me all the time, like an invisible backpack no one else could see. The moment
in the bathtub was also a moment when I saw a vision of what the future could
be.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I began to believe just the tiniest
bit in an adult version of myself, and I began in the smallest way to suspect
that maybe after all, I really was enough.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span></div>
<span style="font-family: Cambria; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-bidi; mso-fareast-font-family: "MS 明朝"; mso-fareast-language: JA; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">My body suddenly seemed a little better than it had
an hour before.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My mind felt clear.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>For the first time I began to envision a
future for myself.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was the beginning
of adulthood and the ending of childhood and I had the good fortune to feel and
experience the transition. </span><br />
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<br />Bandanamomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00022192424529851823noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17774815.post-42691189330981826232016-01-01T13:30:00.000-08:002016-01-01T15:15:22.150-08:00Films I loved in 2015 I always enjoy rounding up my recommendations for films for the current year. I keep track of movies as I see them during the year and I jot down a few thoughts and give them a star rating out of 5. These are all movies that received a 5 star from me. As usual, these are the best of the films I saw - I am sure there are other great movies out there but I might not have seen them. In no particular order<br />
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1. <span style="font-size: large;">Mommy By Xavier Dolan</span> </div>
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This film was about the intensity of the love between a mother and her son. What I loved was two-fold. First off I loved the telling of the intensity of this relationship because the son is very challenging and obviously has some mental health challenges that make parenting particularly taxing. At the same time you have the sense that mom hasn't always known how to be the best mom either. Though explosive at times, the underlying emotion here is devotion between the two of them. I also loved how this was shot on a square format. There were some camera techniques that were very unique and I thought really added to the overall feeling of the movie. </div>
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French w/ subtitles, this one got a 90% rating on rotten tomatoes. </div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">2. While We're Young by Noah Baumbauch</span></div>
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If you're over the age of about 39 you know someone who is desperately trying to stay young. And failing. Because if you're <b>trying</b> too hard to stay young, I guarantee it's not working. If you know that person (and maybe even if you are that person) this movie is just the thing to both confirm how ridiculous it is to try to stay youthful and relevant, while at the same time perhaps reminding you youth is really mind over matter anyway. The young all just want to be established and successful and the old just want to be young again. It's a silly existential dance we do when we try to circumvent the natural progression of life and stay transfixed in time we no longer belong to. But don't let the seriousness of that description I just penned dissuade you - this is actually really funny. There are some hilarious comparisons between the newer generation of hipster and the aging gen x adults who grapple to understand why a VCR would be somehow trendier than digital and trying to remember why we gave up vinyl music albums in the first place if they were so dang cool. This hit home for me too because there is a scene where the desperate to be cool Ben Stiller and Noami Watts decide to try Ayahuasca in hopes the hallucinogen will bring them to some deep and profound point that will erase the angst of aging and renew their youthful outlook while giving them buckets of meaning. If you know anything about Ayahuasca you know it usually brings buckets of puke along with it's insight. This hit home for me because I recently had a long conversation with a 40 something who bought a trip to South America specifically to go try Ayahuasca in the hopes of finding her purpose in life. I really think she's just having a mid life crisis and I wanted to prescribe she go watch this film instead. I think you'll enjoy this no matter your age and no matter how cool you're trying to be (or not). </div>
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Rotten Tomatoes - 86%</div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">3. Dior and I by Frederic Tcheng </span></div>
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This film is an absolute dream. Later, I had to buy this on digital so I can watch it whenever I want. Seeing the inspiring creative process of Dior's Raf Simons (who sadly, just left Dior a few weeks ago) is nothing short of miraculous. Watching the process of creating the couture gowns and all the hand stitching was just incredible. The amount of work that goes into a collection and a show is just astounding. I can't really recommend this enough. </div>
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This one is in french a fair amount of time but not always - partially english. Rotten Tomatoes 81% </div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">4. Kurt Cobain - Montage of Heck by Brett Morgen </span></div>
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Okay look pretty much everyone who knows me knows that I love Kurt Cobain so maybe I'm a little biased on this movie. But I think even if you don't like Cobain this is still entertaining, informative, and an enjoyable ride. The documentary takes an intimate look at Cobain using footage never before seen and augmenting the movie with his artwork in ways that are both provocative and give context and meaning to who Cobain was. For me it was poignant, profound and heartrending. </div>
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97% on Rotten Tomatoes</div>
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[if you want to really go down a Cobain rabbit hole, follow this up with the way more non-mainstream view of the Kurt and Courtney story on Netflix and watch "Soaked in Bleach"]</div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">5. Diary of a Teenage Girl - by Marielle Heller </span></div>
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This film, in spite of being a somewhat disturbing subject matter on it's face, really hit a an interesting balance between tackling a difficult topic and keeping it non-exploitative. To simplify a complex topic the movie is about a coming of age for our teenage protagonist Minnie. But that coming of age is fraught with the difficulties of a mother who parties too much and pays little to no attention to what is going on with her daughter. That daughter's first real boyfriend is also her mother's boyfriend. You sort of want to hate Alexander Skarsgard for taking advantage of a teenage girl and you feel compelled to consider him a predator or a pedophile, but you also realize it's more complicated than that for Minnie. There are no simple emotions or situations here and the film is set in the midst of San Francisco during the post free love age that pretty much confused everything for everyone. High moral ground you won't really find here. But what you will find is a portrayal of everything that is both awesome and horrible about being a teenage girl. The setting of the 70s was so spot on where some films get it wrong, this is really what the 70s looked like. </div>
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Rotten Tomatoes 94%</div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">6. Far From the Madding Crowd - Thomas Vinterberg</span></div>
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Based on Thomas Hardy's original book - the melodrama of some of these old stories is both kind of funny and refreshing. This movie is as romantic as it gets. I loved Carry Mulligan and Matthias Schoenaerts chemistry in this movie. What can I say? This movie is about star-crossed love at it's best, improbable and perfect. Enjoy it for what it is. </div>
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Rotten Tomatoes 86%</div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">7. Crimson Peak - Guillermo Del Toro</span></div>
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Sometimes you just want a good old fashioned gothic style ghost story and this one really worked for me. Del Toro is a dude with a huge imagination and I thought this film really captured all the elements of a perfect ghost story. The film is also beautiful and the attention to detail with the sets and costumes is excellent. </div>
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Rotten Tomatoes 69%</div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">By the Sea - Angelina Jolie </span></div>
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Okay hear me out on this one. Do not go if you don't like slow movies, movies with very little plot, subtle subtext, or long shots that linger on stylistic elements. DO see this if you like any of those things, and additionally love little sea villages, gorgeous clothes, beautiful rooms, languid shots, subdued plot, pretty people, and general moodiness. This is right up my alley, but I'm fully aware I am in the minority about these sorts of things. There's also some kinda deep stuff about voyeurism and obsession with other people's lives which feels particularly interesting coming from Angelina. Whatever else can be said about this I think there is no doubt Angelina meant to make a film that felt more like something created in the mid to early 70s. A beautiful film that gets all the right shots and that is totally accomplished here. </div>
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32% Rotten Tomatoes (see, no one liked it except me)</div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">The Intern - Nancy Myers</span></div>
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First off, Nancy Myers is my feel good guru. This movie was just sweet as all get-out. How rare is it that a movie explores a friendship between a man and a woman and it REALLY is just about friendship. Sometimes I like to just sit on the couch and escape from the world with a good Nancy Myers movie and this is one I'll probably buy for that purpose. There's also, as usual with Nancy, some scrummy interiors to drool over and the main action of the movie is a JCREW-like office in New York that is also visually lovely (and a dream work place environment).</div>
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Rotten Tomatoes - 61%</div>
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This is as foreign film that explores the complexities of a classist society. Set in Brazil, the film is about the relationship between a maid and the household family members she has been employed with for a long time. Her relationship with the son of the household is more like that of mother and son rather than an employee. There are other complications with relationships between family members as well including difficulties with her own daughter. It sounds overly dramatic and there is some drama, but it is also very funny at times, and heartfelt. I really liked the overall message of the film and I thought it was very well made. </div>
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Portuguese with English subtitles - Rotten Tomatoes LOVED this with 96%</div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Love & Mercy - Bill Pohlad </span></div>
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This was super excellent and not just because I think my boyfriend John Cusack did a great job of portraying Brian Wilson. Probably one of the best biographical movies I've ever seen it really helps give context to all of the weird Beach Boys/Brian Wilson drama we've heard about over the years. It also shows what a genius Wilson is and really helps him get his own story out there when for many years other people tried to control his story and give their own versions that were inaccurate. It's a sweet love story to boot and will make you fall in love with Beach Boys music all over again. Both Cusack and Paul Dano do an excellent acting job here. </div>
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Rotten Tomatoes totally loved this with a 90% approval rating</div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Iris - Albert Maysles</span></div>
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LOVED this. Iris Apfel is a national treasure. If you don't know who she is or why she's pretty much the most awesome senior fashionista in existence, run out and rent this right away. You'll fall in love with her immediately. I can only HOPE to be 1/10th as cool as this lady is when I'm old. </div>
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Rotten Tomatoes agrees she's super awesome with 98% really you can't get a higher rating than that!</div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Animals - Colin Schiffli</span></div>
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This is one probably not that many people saw. If you're interested in a story about the toll of addiction, this is a really good one. Realistically providing insight into how addiction both humanizes and dehumanizes a person at the same time. The movie is both empathetic towards their heroin addiction, and yet ultimately not overly sympathetic. Which is a difficult and nice balance to strike. A lot of times movies about addiction sort of feel like they get it wrong, but I felt like this one really got it right. Beautifully filmed as well. If you're not into a movie about two drug addicts and their struggle to survive, I understand. But if its a topic you find remotely interesting and you like good filmmaking, this one is good. </div>
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Rotten Tomatoes - 84% </div>
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Lastly here are honorable mentions - movies I really liked this year but didn't make my cut for top 10-15. All are movies i enjoyed and you might like as well - some are more mainstream and therefore didn't make my cut to review them because it's likely you already heard PLENTY about them (Inside Out, I'm looking at you)</div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Inside Out </span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Brooklyn</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">I'll See You In My Dreams</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">The Big Short</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">An Irrational Man</span></div>
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AND as a bonus - I asked all of my girlfriends what movies they enjoyed most this year and I got these which I neglected list myself: </div>
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The Martian</div>
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Still Alice</div>
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Infinitely Polar Bear </div>
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Home</div>
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Bridge of Spies</div>
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Big Hero 6</div>
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Anything you loved that I didn't mention? Checking out the list above should keep you busy for a while. </div>
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<br />Bandanamomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00022192424529851823noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17774815.post-80141234355857907802015-12-11T21:17:00.000-08:002015-12-11T21:20:10.900-08:00A love note to Harkins Camelview <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-lNlKpBCZCO0/VmuX3sp02WI/AAAAAAAAOSI/GynMZ1iXei0/s1600/FullSizeRender%25286%2529.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="116" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-lNlKpBCZCO0/VmuX3sp02WI/AAAAAAAAOSI/GynMZ1iXei0/s320/FullSizeRender%25286%2529.jpg" width="320" /> </a></div>
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Will I be able to make you understand why I love this place so much and why I will miss it so much?
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I do not remember the first time I went to this theatre* <i>(*blogger wants to tell me this is spelled wrong, but its Harkins Theatres and I'm sticking to that.)</i> I just know that since I moved to Phoenix in 1995 I have been in love with this place. I love that it shows all independent and foreign films. I love that it's an older building and the screens are kinda old school, the seats aren't stadium and they aren't fancy, the clientele is a weird mixture of middle aged people and college students, and the experience feels very intimate. The whole place is cozy as hell. Even the bathrooms are likable. The murals are cool and the walls are slightly dingy and nothing about it is really slick or what I've come to experience at the nicer newer theatres and I totally dig that. And those mushroom shade structures out front? It hurts my heart they are going away.<br />
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But what I think I probably love the most about this place is that it helped me heal from my divorce. It helped me get to know myself better and to be a happier person. I am being totally honest when I say I don't think I would be doing as well as I am emotionally without this place.<br />
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Let me back up for a minute.<br />
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When I was in high school I got into this thing where I felt like I needed to be out doing something every Friday night. I mean maybe sometimes that would be hanging out at a friends house, but a lot of times it was going to the movies, going to a football game, going to a dance, or being silly with my friends driving around Rexburg Idaho. I went out on Saturdays sometimes too but it felt like I pretty much ALWAYS went out on Friday.<br />
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In college it was similar.
When I was in college I had another experience that contributed to why I love Camelview so much - and really movies in general. The summer between my Sophomore and Junior year of college was little rough (an understatement) - for lots of reasons I was pretty depressed. I had recently moved to Provo and while I love Provo that first summer was a little bit of a difficult adjustment. I remember one day I was in my room which was part of the attic of an old house in downtown Provo. It was hot. No air conditioning! I was sweltering and in a very bad mood. I remember there was no one at home to do anything with and I really needed to get out of the house. I remember having this vague idea about the movies and air conditioning. I got dressed up in this summer dress, put on full make-up, did my hair, and then walked to the movie theatre in downtown Provo. The movie was "The Secret of My Success" with Michael J. Fox. I went to that movie alone. I was so much happier afterwards. Not only was it so much cooler getting out of that stifling old attic but it just felt good to go and do something. From then on I used going to the movies by myself from time to time as a way to regroup.<br />
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There's something so magical about movies for me. That summer in Provo I learned there was a Foreign Cinema on campus in the Kimball Building. I quickly fell in love with Foreign films. Pretty soon I was traveling to Salt Lake with my friend Nan to see movies we couldn't see in Provo. Movies like "Manon of the Spring" and "My Life as A Dog". These are still old favorites. I don't know why exactly I grew to love films of a quirkier and more exotic quality. I loved the pacing of foreign films. I loved that a lot of the time they are just more of a contemplation on life than an action packed sequence of events. They are often more quiet and I need that sometimes. I like the feeling of watching something in a foreign language and then having that language kind of wash over me. I delude myself often into feeling I can speak Portuguese for an hour or two. I enjoy American movies that are independent usually much more than mainstream films for the same reason.<br />
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For many years when I was married we went out on Friday nights. Sometimes just to dinner, or maybe to the art gallery, or First Friday, or some event - maybe dinner with friends. I always enjoyed going out on Friday. It felt like a great way to kick off the weekend and my fall back "go-to" activity was a movie and dinner. In retrospect I am not sure if my husband really enjoyed that as much as I did.<br />
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To me there was nothing better than driving around in the convertible with the top down on a warm Arizona evening, smelling all the goodness of the desert, anticipating a perfectly cooked steak and a movie. When my marriage ended my husband and I had 50/50 custody and we split the time the children were at his home and mine. I had them slightly more often than he did and one of the things we agreed on was that they would go to his house on Friday nights and stay until sometime on Saturday. I was okay with that and at first I would try to fill my Friday night schedule with meeting friends for dinner or something similar. But often I felt like I was just trying to fill up the time so I didn't have to think too much about being alone. It is weird when you have a bunch of friends who are in couples and suddenly it really doesn't work to hang out with any of them anymore. I totally understand why that happens, but it doesn't make it suck any less. Eventually I started to plan ahead that I would always go to a movie by myself if I didn't have anything else to do. And often (usually) I preferred that to anything else. It was the perfect way to spend my Friday.<br />
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I would drive, up Lincoln Drive to Scottsdale Road with the windows rolled down, smelling the desert and glad I had somewhere to go and something to look forward to. When you're overcoming something difficult spending time alone can be very soothing. There's no one to answer to and if you want to feel sad or cry - you can go right ahead. I healed one Friday night at a time. Camelview was a huge part of that and for that reason I will always love it.
In the movies, in the dark, you have epiphanies about things. You learn a lot of important things about yourself. You see things you never saw before. You hear things in a new way. You become a student of human nature and it teaches you. You cry. You laugh. When you leave - whatever was wrong when you came is all better.<br />
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I know losing one movie theatre isn't going to totally ruin my little ritual. There are other theatres. And there will always be great movies. And the new movie theatre that is replacing Camelview will be awesome with it's stadium seats and dining options and blah blah blah. Very slick and beautiful and I'm sure lovely in it's own way. But it definitely will not be the same.
I hate that we throw things away because they are old. I hate that people always want newer things and shinier things.
They are hardly ever better. People usually figure that out when it's way to late.
My last movie there was last weekend watching Amelie. Which is one of my favorite movies and I saw it there when it first came out. It was a fitting note to end things on.
Anyway. This is my love note to Harkins Camelview. Thank you.
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<br />Bandanamomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00022192424529851823noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17774815.post-88759318449367353762015-07-26T19:39:00.000-07:002015-07-26T19:39:07.001-07:00The Podcasts I Love Hey there! It's been a long time!<br />
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I've had this blog post in the back of my head for a while now. Do you listen to podcasts? I drive a lot for work and while I'm driving I sometimes listen to a book on audio or music of course - but other times a podcast is just the right thing to keep me awake and my brain engaged. When I'm listening to an audio book and I'm tired I can find myself drifting off and getting distracted and all of the sudden I have to rewind because I don't know what was just discussed - with podcasts, for whatever reason, I am less likely to do that.<br />
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So here are the Podcasts I have discovered that I really like:<br />
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<b><span style="color: purple;">1. MYSTERY SHOW</span> </b></div>
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This one is my newest and probably most favorite and you are going to love it guys. So Starlee Kine, who I have listened to and liked for many years on This American Life, has this new show which is kinda sort hard to explain but genius and awesome. Basically Starlee takes a mystery that you cannot solve on your own and she solves it for you. The offerings thus far have flung us into the weird world of Britney Spears reading habits, video stores who mysteriously vanish in the middle of the night, and a rambling sleuth all over the southwest for a belt buckle's owner. I know it sounds weird and it is but it is also HIGHLY entertaining and wonderful. There is something about Starlee's quirky yet soothing voice combined with offbeat amateur detective work that is perfection. <br />
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<b><span style="color: purple;">2. Reply All </span></b></div>
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<span style="color: purple;"><span style="color: black;">Reply All sort seems like a show I would not think I would like. The common theme here is shows related to the internet and technology. That sounds like snooze fest. But that is not really what this is. The stories Alex Goldman and PJ Vogt give us on this show are much more than that - they are about things as interesting as how an orthodox Jew continues to find access to his community through the internet even when he's no longer orthodox, how teenage girls have vast conspiracy theories about One Direction, and phenomenon like "weird twitter". Just try it, I think you'll really dig it. These guys are very entertaining and do a great job of finding really interesting stories. </span></span><b><span style="color: purple;"> </span></b></div>
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<span style="color: purple;"><span style="color: black;">The Moth is really cool. It's people performing their personal stories live, under a spotlight in a roomful of strangers. They hold live events around the country and broadcast them here. Super interesting to listen to people share their personal stories and the emotions and content are all over the place but they are always entertaining. </span><b> </b></span></div>
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<span style="color: purple;"><span style="color: black;">The list would be incomplete without this - I have loved This American Life for many many years. I don't always get to catch it on the radio on Saturday afternoons and now you can listen via podcast. Ira Glass is one of my favorite people ever and this broadcast has made my life more rich than it otherwise would have been and how many times can you say that about something entertaining? </span></span><br />
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<b><span style="color: purple;">5. Invisibilia</span></b></div>
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<span style="color: purple;"><span style="color: black;"> </span><b> </b></span><br />
<span style="color: purple;"><b> </b><span style="color: black;">Invisibilia takes a stab at understanding human behavior - delving into beliefs, assumptions and emotions. The two hosts are Lulu Miller and Alix Spiegel and they manage to combine science, research, social science, and old fashioned story telling into this wonderful mix that makes you feel smarter and to see the world in different ways all at the same time. </span></span><br />
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<b><span style="color: purple;">6. Love + Radio </span></b></div>
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<span style="color: purple;"><span style="color: black;">I want to warn right up front this show sometimes veers into some territory some may find offensive. Nick van der Kolk will give you a warning up front if he thinks you might be offended by something or if it's explicit in some way. I will tell you I have found many of these episodes absolutely mesmerizing. It's about love, human nature, and all the weird ways human beings experience love and relationships. But they create this show by talking to some really interesting human beings. They then mix the show in a way that makes you feel like you're on drugs sometimes. Really. It's pretty awesome if you're into feeling your brain stretch and expand as you listen to a podcast. </span></span></div>
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<span style="color: purple;"><span style="color: black;">Rumble Strip is produced by Erica Heilman in Vermont and the concept is basically she interviews random people and manages to come up with some really surprising and interesting stories. One week it might be an artist or a criminal or even a soccer mom but they will tell you about what they love, hate, think, feel or something they have done. It sounds weird and maybe boring but it really never is anything but fascinating. </span></span></div>
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<span style="color: purple;"><span style="color: black;">If you somehow missed the phenomenon of Serial I have no idea what rock you've been hiding under. Seriously? Anyway, if you did you really MUST go listen to the episodes already produced by Sarah Koenig. Serial this season was the story of a man accused of murder and sitting in jail but there were a lot of answered questions in the case. It's possibly the most entertaining piece of detective work I've ever heard. I was so hooked I would look forward to each Thursday morning knowing there would be a new episode. Sarah is currently producing a new story for the new season but we don't quite know what that story will be yet. With her talent, I'm sure it will be amazing. </span></span></div>
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<span style="color: purple;"><span style="color: black;"> I'm positive these will keep you busy for a while! Let me know if you have a favorite I haven't mentioned. I'm always looking for more ideas. </span></span><br />
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Bandanamomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00022192424529851823noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17774815.post-23503528261512876452015-04-12T21:43:00.000-07:002015-04-12T21:48:09.212-07:00Weekend Photography - Tucson's Colorful Adobes Sometimes you actually get to go on vacation for a half minute, spend some time with people you really like, and take some photos. Tucson is a fun place to take photos because there is so much to love about the colors.<br />
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These were all just taken on my phone. But they still turned out pretty good.<br />
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I should be doing homework. I am so over school. And by "over" I mean just plain old tired. Hopefully I can rally! Bandanamomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00022192424529851823noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17774815.post-3551546930675025302015-02-15T17:06:00.000-08:002015-02-15T17:06:12.365-08:00What I've learned being a case manager and why you might like it too<br />
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To be honest I didn't even really know case managing was a job or thing when I first started out as psychology major in college. I knew I loved psychology and thought I wanted to be a psychologist and/or counselor some day and that seemed the most logical route. Everyone was always commenting on there being no jobs for people with a Bachelor's in Psych and I pretty much assumed that was the case. I had no idea the vast amount of people employed in psych and social work related positions that (usually) require a Bachelor's degree in Social Work or Psychology (and a few other majors are sometimes accepted as well). I will likely still be working in that position for little bit longer but I'm nearing the point where I am starting to look back on what I've learned. <br />
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1. I think if you are planning on doing something in the behavioral health field with a Masters or PhD you should at least consider working in a case management or similar role for a while. The amount of knowledge it gives about the ins and outs of the public health system is especially valuable info that you really can't get any other way. <br />
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2. It's very rewarding many (most?) days. If you stick with it long enough to watch people actually make huge strides and changes in their lives it really is a wonderful thing.<br />
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3. You'll never get to the end of your to-do list, but you'll learn to be okay with that. I'm sure there are a lot of other jobs that have this same problem but it feels like an acrobatic feat sometimes to stay in compliance with things that must be done, accomplish other really important tasks, but actually do things that impact your client. All of those things that you have to do - some of the time, they don't feel like they serve the client that well. Which is really no one's fault but a huge flaw in the system. It's given me a lot of insight into how the public sometimes recognizes a problem, the media's reporting of the problem skews or simplifies the issue, the legislature tackles the issue with something that sounds like a good idea and the result is red tape and paperwork which further hampers things at times. I don't have all the solutions but I can more clearly see what the problems are, and that is <b>something</b> at least.<br />
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4. You'll never be bored. NEVER. I can't think of a single day I have even had time to be bored or have a bored thought. The day flies by and 8 hours is never enough time for your work day. If you're lucky you'll work somewhere that doesn't allow you to work over 40 hours. When I first started working I thought that was a dumb rule (because, see point 3 above, hello, endless to do list). But it's not a dumb rule because people would work themselves to death if the expectation was there for over-time or salaried employment for case managers. <br />
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5. When I say you'll never be bored, I don't just mean because you'll be too busy to be bored. I mean every day is actually really interesting and intellectually stimulating - emotionally taxing sometimes too, but also rewarding. You'll go through a slew of emotions every week and most days, you'll probably enjoy how you spend your time (at least that is generally my experience).<br />
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6. If you work in children's services you'll probably have more insights about parenting - whether you are a parent or not - than you've ever had. And you'll probably feel like a better parent than you've ever felt. Which is not to say that all the parents you'll work with are doing a bad job. Some of them are doing a great job under difficult circumstances. I'm sure there are unique insights those who work with adults have.<br />
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7. You'll learn to love people, or at least like them, that might have seemed impossible to like before. You'll learn to judge people a lot less. I remember when I used to sometimes get an assignment and read through the file and get nervous about how I was going to relate to a particularly intense and difficult teenager or whatever. Then I would meet them and learn they love to play chess or some other weird little factoid that would give me an in to getting to know them a lot better. Conversely, people/kids who appear to be perfectly fine are often battling some really difficult things you can't be aware of by looking at them. Without a doubt I just don't assume anything about people anymore.<br />
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8. If you work with kids your heart will break like pretty much all the time. And you'll learn to be okay with that because that just means you are still human, and that's a good thing.<br />
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9. You will expand as a person in ways that will surprise you. <br />
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10. You won't make any money and that's a problem - however, there are lots of ways you can move up in the field into other roles that earn more. Still, it's not something that anyone is going to pursue because of the financial gain involved. For me, the experience was worth the low pay at least for the period of time I have worked in the field and certainly for some people, if it's a secondary income, that's not so bad. <br />
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Sometimes even people who don't have a degree in a relevant field can get a job in case management if they have relevant job or volunteer work experience so it's definitely something to consider if you believe it might be for you. <br />
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When I'm not a case manager anymore in about a year, I'm sure I'll miss many things about it. <br />
<br />Bandanamomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00022192424529851823noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17774815.post-7364696601696944592014-12-27T21:53:00.002-08:002014-12-27T22:07:42.642-08:00Movies I Dug in 2014 In no discernible or important order whatsoever, here is my annual list of movies that I really dug and you maybe will dig too. <br />
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I've not seen every movie that I wanted in 2014 so some will have to wait until Netflix or Itunes. Which means the list is not comprehensive and you may have seen something amazing that I missed. I keep a running list of movies I intend to catch up on some day, but there are always more than I can possibly keep on top of.<br />
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These are the movies I saw this year that I considered the best of 2014 which ended up being a "top 14" list. <br />
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For whatever reason this year I included where I saw it and if I was alone or not because, I don't know, somehow it seems like that might provide context that may or may not matter. <br />
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1. Adult World </div>
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This move is one of those "if you blinked you missed it" - most theatres never carried it and the release was not wide, even I watched it on Itunes because I missed it the one week it was in the theatres here in Phoenix. And every one knows John Cusack is my jam and so you'll automatically be suspicious of this pick and think it's all due to my Cusack near-obsession. But you'd be wrong! I have long ago abandoned the notion that a movie is automatically good just because it has Cusack in it (and recently I am sad to report there have been a spate of disappointing movies from our Dear John) but this movie is the exception to all of that and I genuinely liked it very much. Emma Stone is a young poet who is slightly deluded about the path to success and John C. plays an aging punk poet named Rat who disabuses her of her deluded notions. I read somewhere that John's character may be an alternate version of Lloyd Dobler had Lloyd grown up to realize his optimism was badly misplaced and gone the route of curmudgeonly misanthrope instead. (If you aren't a huge fan of "Say Anything" you have no idea what I'm talking about right now. If you've never seen "Say Anything" you might as well quit reading the rest of this blog post and RUN to the nearest Apple TV or Amazon Prime and rent that movie immediately so that you can get your life back on track since clearly, something is terribly amiss and in need of fixing). Anyway, don't get too excited this isn't on the level of Say Anything. But it is great work by Cusack and a subversive comedy that I found very cute and fun. Rotten Tomatoes gave it a 54% which is not great, but I think it's a solid little movie you should try out for size. </div>
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2. Million Dollar Arm </div>
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This is a move that honestly I probably never would have seen except I was going to the movies with a friend to the Harkins at Tempe Marketplace and we couldn't sort of agree on anything and I just finally suggested this because I think Jon Hamm is cute and figured I could live through any movie where Jon would be featured prominently on the silver screen and I could just ignore the hum of whatever nonsense was wrecking the rest of the film. But geez, I was totally wrong and honestly this was one of those cute feel good movies that somehow manages to get the cute and the feel good all in the right proportions and you kind of stumble on to this thing that warms your heart when you think your heart is all frozen over and unwarmable. Basically Hamm's character goes to India to recruit baseball players from cricket players and hijinks ensue which sounds kinda dumb (hence my initial hesitation) but ends up being a really sweet story (based on a true story, which always helps in my opinion) and Hamm is adorable and Lake Bell is also in this and I really think she is awesome and really I only have good things to say about this movie. It's also totally clean and PG too so if you have kiddos and you're looking for a "family movie" this is a good one. Rotten tomatoes gave it a 61% but the user score was higher at 70%. </div>
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3. Land Ho</div>
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Basically Land Ho proves that I didn't only go to movies based on cute guys being in them cause these guys are pretty old and clearly I didn't go just because there was someone in the film I had a crush on (which I am now worried you'll think due to film #1 and #2 on my list both having actors I think are pretty dreamy). My 17 year old daughter and I saw this at Harkins Camelview and gosh darn it if I don't love that art house theatre with all my heart. You know, it's not that easy to talk a 17 year old into going to a film about 2 old dudes who travel to Iceland, but she's a good sport. She really liked this movie and so did I. It's more or a less a contemplation on aging and getting the most out of life at any age. Iceland is beautiful and this made me want to go there on vacation and there was just a lot to love about this. And honestly one of these dudes did seem pretty cute to me by the end of the movie, making me question a lot of prejudices I have about older men. So many movies are about people in their 20s or 30s and it is really nice once in a while to remind people about lives lived beyond what might consider ones "prime". The critics liked this with an 80% rotten tomatoes score, but the public was less enthusiastic at 56%. I attribute that to this being a movie where nothing is blown up, there are no car chases and many people may accuse it of being "a movie where nothing happens". And they would be totally wrong about that because in my opinion, quite a lot happens and especially, if you're keen on this sort of thing, something might happen to you internally while you watch, which in my opinion is the best kind of movie. </div>
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4. Finding Vivian Maier</div>
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This one we also saw at Camelview 5 and actually my 17 year old was the one who really wanted to go to this. It's a documentary about a nanny who was secretly an incredible photographer. She captured some amazing images on film but the photos were not discovered until somewhat recently. The story is mostly about the photography, but also sort of the mystery of who Vivian was, and not only who people thought she was - but who she really was, which almost no one really was aware of while she was alive. It made me think a lot about the lives we sometimes live in private and how often we really don't feel known or understood by others and what it all means. I think you'd have to be pretty immune to the beauty of photography not to enjoy this film. Pretty much everyone loved this with a 94% rotten tomatoes critic score and a 89% user score. </div>
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5. The Grand Budapest Hotel </div>
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This film is the typical stuff you expect from Wes Anderson. Goofy, Eccentric, and a "Wild Ride" all come to mind. An old fashioned "farce" of sorts. Anderson's films always have that kind of dreamy, "this only makes sense because I'm asleep" thing going for them. The intricate sets and costumes and set ups are so delicious in Grand Budapest, I think it's one of his best films. If you DON'T like Wes Anderson films, I still think you might like this one. Give it a try. My daughter and I saw this at Camelview 5 and later bought it on Itunes as well. Most everyone loved this too with a 92% critic score on rotten tomatoes and an 86% user score. </div>
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6. The One I Love </div>
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This was a surprisingly awesome film. And impossible to describe. Like I don't know what to say. Weird, quirky, magical, odd, subversive. Like if you took a relationship and held it up to a fun-house mirror as a means of marriage therapy. My daughter and I saw this at Shea 14 and she really loved it too. It's funny and romantic in a very unconventional way and it definitely poses new questions about relationships that might make you think about surprising and complex questions and "what does it all mean". Rotten tomatoes critic score of 80% and user score of 79%; I did hear someone who left the theatre at the same time as us say "I honestly don't know how I feel about what I just saw, I have so many questions!". It is a great movie to discuss with other people afterwards. </div>
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7. Palo Alto </div>
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This <b><i>might </i></b>be the favorite of this whole list. Although I wanted my daughter to see this with me, I ended up attending alone at Camelview 5. It was just such a great portrayal of teens and weird suburban/urban angst and poor parenting practices so common today. You get the sense in this film that parents only exist on the periphery, if at all, and everything feels precariously tilting towards a dangerous collision for these teens as a result. Gia Coppola proves herself to be a worthy embodiment of the family name. The acting here is great, you do actually feel like you're just watching these teens in their natural habitat and Emma Roberts is very good and Jack Kilmer (son of Val) is excellent. This film also has the best soundtrack of any all year and if I only saw it for the exposure to new music it would have still been worth it, but luckily the film itself is really great. 73% rotten tomatoes score but only 53% users score which I largely attribute to people who had different expectations for what type of movie it would be. Again, many complaints by users that it was "slow". This in my opinion was the genius of the film. Didn't weeks and days go by agonizingly slow when you were a teen? Didn't it almost feel like you literally had to kill time to get it to move? You really feel very much compassion for the teenagers in this film even if some of them are kind of awful to each other, because clearly the adults in their lives aren't offering them much help navigating this tricky territory. </div>
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8. The Lunch Box </div>
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My daughter and I saw this together at Camelview 5 and it was a great feel good romance. Set in India the premise was simple yet effective. You're never quite sure if things will work out or not all the way up until the very end and I like it when movies are not predictable and leave room for some ambiguity. If you are looking for a cute film that won't challenge you too much but might be a little different from the norm (it's a foreign film set in India) then I think you'll really like this one. 96% on rotten tomatoes for critic score and 87% for users. </div>
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<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-h1jCd1QlAdQ/VJ3Zc33cGkI/AAAAAAAAOH4/watHHFCjawk/s1600/MV5BMTYzNDc2MDc0N15BMl5BanBnXkFtZTgwOTcwMDQ5MTE%40._V1_SX640_SY720_.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-h1jCd1QlAdQ/VJ3Zc33cGkI/AAAAAAAAOH4/watHHFCjawk/s1600/MV5BMTYzNDc2MDc0N15BMl5BanBnXkFtZTgwOTcwMDQ5MTE%40._V1_SX640_SY720_.jpg" height="640" width="432" /> </a></div>
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9. Boyhood </div>
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This film really doesn't need my recommendation, lots of people loved this and it has gotten a ton of press for being shot over the course of 12 years. But you really can't say enough what a marvelous trick that is to watch characters age on film over more than a decade. The story is compelling and I thoroughly enjoyed this. I also saw this with my teenage daughter at Camelview 5. I saw a lot more movies with her this year than I usually do - probably because she has gotten old enough to appreciate the same types of films I do. She really likes this since it is about a kid growing up and becoming who they are meant to be. Watching the boy change and grow is interesting but I found myself immersed in watching the adults change as the children grow. Sometimes we fail to realize how much raising children and watching them grow changes us too. 99% critic score on rotten tomatoes and 89% user score. </div>
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<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-VGkH0PFKgiw/VJ3ZdjRf4lI/AAAAAAAAOIA/I4C0koPQYKc/s1600/MV5BNzk5MjM3NDEwN15BMl5BanBnXkFtZTgwMDIxNjYzMjE%40._V1_SX640_SY720_.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-VGkH0PFKgiw/VJ3ZdjRf4lI/AAAAAAAAOIA/I4C0koPQYKc/s1600/MV5BNzk5MjM3NDEwN15BMl5BanBnXkFtZTgwMDIxNjYzMjE%40._V1_SX640_SY720_.jpg" height="640" width="416" /> </a></div>
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10. The Skeleton Twins </div>
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I had kinda high expectations for this film and although it was less funny than I imagined it would be, it was also more poignant than I expected. Sometimes it was actually really funny, but overall the tone of this is much more serious than you might think and I actually think that's it's strength. Bill Hader plays the gay twin brother of Kristen Wiig and they have not seen each other in a long time. The movie opens with each of them attempting suicide and it becomes more clear as the movie progresses why they didn't speak for 10 years and why each of them has some fairly serious mental health issues. Besides dealing very compassionately with some issues of depression and family complications as well as providing some good comic relief sprinkled through out, I also love this because it shows this really special and great relationship between a brother and sister - that's kind of the love story here, sibling love, which is not something that gets touched on much in movies except in a very tangential way. Here is plays the starring role in the films heart and for that, I really loved it. I think it also delved into some issues regarding humanizing some pretty interesting human frailties that I also really appreciated. I saw it alone at Scottsdale Cine Capri and I also now own this movie in my Itunes collection. Critics and users also pretty well like this too with 87% and 77% respectively. </div>
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<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-ZzDfWM_oUdE/VJ3Ze_U05lI/AAAAAAAAOIY/3GYR3wtjX0Y/s1600/only_lovers_left_alive_ver3_xlg.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-ZzDfWM_oUdE/VJ3Ze_U05lI/AAAAAAAAOIY/3GYR3wtjX0Y/s1600/only_lovers_left_alive_ver3_xlg.jpeg" height="640" width="452" /> </a></div>
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11. Only Lovers Left Alive </div>
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This I saw with one of my oldest friends at Camelview 5 and immediately upon the opening of the film I knew I was really going to dig it because the open was so unique I've never seen anything like it done as effectively before. Immediately you are drawn into this weird world of vampires that is totally different from any way you've seen them portrayed before and not only that, the director manages to make us feel that we are on some kind of weird drug trip right from the get go. I mean, that's a neat trick don't you think? I have not seen this on the small screen so I don't know if the feeling of being drugged works as well if you are watching it at home. The entire movie you feel like you're in this really interesting world and even if you could argue that not much happens (and for reals, that is a good argument you could make I suppose compared to pretty much any other vampire movie you've ever seen) I feel like this vampire movie packs more philosophical punch than any other I've ever seen. It's beautifully shot and completely worth a look even if you generally shy away from vampire films. The critics gave it an 85% and the users a 79%. </div>
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<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-WxzQ_5k0bUE/VJ3ZeKJM5iI/AAAAAAAAOIE/To3djG1T70k/s1600/This_Is_Where_I_Leave_You_poster.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-WxzQ_5k0bUE/VJ3ZeKJM5iI/AAAAAAAAOIE/To3djG1T70k/s1600/This_Is_Where_I_Leave_You_poster.jpg" height="400" width="268" /> </a></div>
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12. This Is Where I Leave You </div>
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This movie I had super low expectations for because it really did not get great reviews but I went anyway with my daughter to Shea 14 because as I recall we were bored and there weren't that many options. I suspected with Jason Bateman in it I'd at least have a laugh or two ( I dig that man and he always can make me laugh) but then I ended up being pretty surprised by how well done the movie was and how much I really liked it. I had never read the book so I don't know if that would have changed my opinion or not but I just thought it was way better than it was given credit for. It's basically about all the complicated ways we interact with our families and in our relationships, it's about regret and embracing our lives in ways that make the best of what is. It's kind of about how painful it is to try to grow up to become who we're meant to be and how we sometimes take a lot of side roads before we get there. We make compromises and we learn to be okay with them - or maybe we don't. Basically the premise of this movie is life is messy. But also kinda funny if you look at it the right way. The critics really didn't dig this and gave it a 42% but the users took more kindly to it with a 62%. Make of that what you will, maybe I'm just a big fan of Jason Bateman, Tina Fey and Adam Driver but I think you might like this. The critics mostly seemed to criticize that it was too sweet. I don't know, I like a little sweet with my bitter once in a while. </div>
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<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-3NeLfXJXA-4/VJ3ZeQ2wxKI/AAAAAAAAOII/pc7IgLOWiyI/s1600/Whiplash_poster.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-3NeLfXJXA-4/VJ3ZeQ2wxKI/AAAAAAAAOII/pc7IgLOWiyI/s1600/Whiplash_poster.jpg" height="400" width="270" /> </a></div>
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13. Whiplash </div>
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I saw this alone at Shea 14 and I really dug it. It's intense and it is about a drummer who is in a special ensemble in a prestigious music school. His musical director is a fanatic who borders on being abusive and then crosses the line into abuse many times during the film. The movie makes us ask questions about what it means to be successful, where pressure to succeed crosses over into something unhelpful and what does it take to truly become a musical genius or to be "the best". The movie takes a few twists and turns and ends up being somewhat surprising even though the majority of this movie is literally watching someone drum their guts out. I don't even feel particularly interested in musicians or drummers and I still found this really fascinating and great. The critics loved this and gave it a 96% and the users whole heartedly agreed. </div>
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<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-r6hgNz2yLNc/VJ3Zfll0EUI/AAAAAAAAOIg/7kQ2LdalXhI/s1600/wild.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-r6hgNz2yLNc/VJ3Zfll0EUI/AAAAAAAAOIg/7kQ2LdalXhI/s1600/wild.jpg" height="360" width="640" /></a></div>
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14. Wild </div>
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I saw this at Camelview 5 with my daughter. She and I both really liked it. In fact, it's right up there with my favorites for the year and I think the reason why is it felt personally meaningful to me. Basically its based on a true story where a woman hikes all the way from Mexico/California border to the Canadian/Washington state border. She is fighting some personal demons and she learns a lot about her self in the process. I think if you can allow the film to sort of wash over you there's a lot you can learn about yourself here too regardless of what your personal challenges might be (she's kicking heroin and mourning the loss of her mother and her marriage - your tragedy does not need to be nearly that extreme). We all travel our own journeys and hopefully those journey's do something similar for us where we learn self-acceptance and test our mettle. If this is something you've experienced or are going through now, I think you'll really like this. The critics mostly liked it too, giving it a 92% and the users gave it an 81%. </div>
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<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-Yazk1n0EZE8/VJ8Uxf3O_aI/AAAAAAAAOJY/AuW3726qM1M/s1600/MV5BMTU1MDEwMDg4Nl5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTgwOTk3NTcxMTE%40._V1_SX640_SY720_.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-Yazk1n0EZE8/VJ8Uxf3O_aI/AAAAAAAAOJY/AuW3726qM1M/s1600/MV5BMTU1MDEwMDg4Nl5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTgwOTk3NTcxMTE%40._V1_SX640_SY720_.jpg" height="640" width="432" /> </a></div>
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15. Under The Skin </div>
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This I saw with a friend at Camelview 5. I almost didn't put it on the list because it is so fricking weird and I just...well, this movie took me days and weeks to process what I felt about it. But the thing is, it really stuck. Like I actually thought about this movie a lot. This is one of those movies that made me go do a whole google search afterwards to figure out what it all meant and to see if my conclusions were even correct or at least in the right general train of thought. Just know, this whole deal is totally bizarre and you really will not know what in the heck you are watching and you'll feel completely off balance by the whole thing. BUT, you sure as heck aren't going to be bored and if this doesn't give you something to chew on I don't know what on earth would. So I highly recommend it, but also offer you extreme caution that it won't be anything you expect. I'm not going to try to explain the actual plot because it will ruin it. The critics pretty well dug it at 86% but the general public came away pretty confused with a 52%. Not surprising. But you know yourself well enough - do you like stuff that is sort of weird and subversive and not obvious and will make you work to think and figure out what is going on? then you'll love it. If you don't have that sense of adventure about your film choices - go ahead and skip this one! </div>
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And here are a few more that I almost included: </div>
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Calvary </div>
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Chef</div>
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Begin Again </div>
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Enemy</div>
Bandanamomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00022192424529851823noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17774815.post-74682394853717195102014-11-30T18:06:00.001-08:002014-11-30T18:07:56.089-08:00Identity Crisis Well pretty much an entire fall has escaped me without a single blog post. Not that I didn't want to blog - I did. And not that I didn't think of things to blog about - because I have a list I keep on my phone of ideas. But due to a multitude of factors, it didn't happen.<br />
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I don't know what this blog will end up being. It's having an identity crisis of sorts.<br />
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I still have things I'd like to blog about that are design oriented in nature. I'm still obsessed with beautiful imagery, photography, lovely kitchens and luxurious bathrooms.<br />
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<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-uwCLgBOfMMA/VHvH82PwBHI/AAAAAAAAOGQ/pDlSJi7e4F4/s1600/Screen%2BShot%2B2014-11-30%2Bat%2B6.43.33%2BPM.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-uwCLgBOfMMA/VHvH82PwBHI/AAAAAAAAOGQ/pDlSJi7e4F4/s1600/Screen%2BShot%2B2014-11-30%2Bat%2B6.43.33%2BPM.png" height="640" width="434" /> </a></div>
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<span style="color: #6aa84f;">Is this not the prettiest room in the universe? Does it not make you happy just to look at it??? </span></div>
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But I also have things I'd like to say or share about good mental health. Since I'm working on becoming a licensed therapist, I have some doubts at times about how much or what I want to say about that given the possible likelihood that future clients may stumble on this blog looking for information. That could be good, and has the potential to be something positive, but it's something I really need to think more about. In fact, I need to take a good look at whether I want to keep the blog at all (or if I should just make it private - which of course no one would read and then it would just be a diary, and I have another diary app for that purpose really).<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">This thought is at the root of how I see therapy - helping clients see and think a little differently so that they have the tools to create solutions in their lives, live life more fully, and have peace. </td></tr>
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I've had this blog since 2005 - I'm not too keen to totally give it up really. It contains a lot of thoughts, feelings and ideas that really represent me and I like the idea that if my grandchildren wanted to know more about me someday, reading my blog might be valuable (sort of - or they would at least know what sort of interior design I really liked back in the "olden" days).<br />
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I often feel like blogging parenting advice, because the longer I work with kids in case management the more I feel like I did a pretty good job with my own parenting and I think it might be valuable information sometimes. <br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-DaYseaAe1mI/VHvMPHnvl7I/AAAAAAAAOGo/9JyMT2D16cI/s1600/Screen%2BShot%2B2014-11-30%2Bat%2B7.02.03%2BPM.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-DaYseaAe1mI/VHvMPHnvl7I/AAAAAAAAOGo/9JyMT2D16cI/s1600/Screen%2BShot%2B2014-11-30%2Bat%2B7.02.03%2BPM.png" height="400" width="276" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I feel like I could write loads of lists like this...</td></tr>
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It's more an abundance of things that I would like to blog about that makes it confusing and difficult to focus in on one thing, rather than a dearth of ideas. This blog doesn't know what it is anymore because it wants to be too many things and therefore, slowly, is is just quietly humming along with no new posts.<br />
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I still get around 200 unique hits per day (way down from the days when I got around 500 per day and largely due to me not posting new posts) and if you check out pinterest you will see many of my blog posts are re-pinned there, and that still happens almost every day too. There's something oddly satisfying about that which I don't really want to completely give up. It makes me feel the tiniest bit like a writer (though I know that's a ridiculously crazy way to call myself a writer).<br />
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<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-5Wp8dBFLp8M/VHvMcjCvNRI/AAAAAAAAOGw/2W0RpWd6sWs/s1600/Screen%2BShot%2B2014-11-30%2Bat%2B6.33.51%2BPM.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-5Wp8dBFLp8M/VHvMcjCvNRI/AAAAAAAAOGw/2W0RpWd6sWs/s1600/Screen%2BShot%2B2014-11-30%2Bat%2B6.33.51%2BPM.png" height="315" width="640" /> </a></div>
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Screen shot of my blog posts people "pinned" in the last week or two </div>
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So coming up you may see posts on the adorable nursery my son and daughter in law put together for my (impending!) granddaughter. Or I might tell you about how to raise children who have a good appreciation for arts and literature. I might talk with you about the single most important piece of parenting advice I can give anyone. Or it might be that I'll share some ideas about good mental health. It might be some photography that I decide to blog about.<br />
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Or maybe I will still be quiet for a while longer.<br />
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But I doubt it. I feel like I've been quiet quite a bit, and I'm ready to not be quite so quiet anymore.<br />
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<br />Bandanamomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00022192424529851823noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17774815.post-28086453399164892142014-08-30T16:44:00.005-07:002014-08-30T16:50:26.531-07:00Saving My Sanity (or Ma Santé Mentale)I discovered something that has been saving my sanity lately. <br />
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Some days I am so busy and things are so crazy at work, I don't know how to slow down when I get off work. In fact, sometimes I am genuinely surprised at how overwhelmingly busy work can be. Sometimes I look at the clock and it's 3 pm and it feels like it should be 10 am and I am slightly panicked about how much I still need to accomplish before the end of my day. I never end my day having accomplished everything I set out to do in the morning. My job will always have a never ending task list that I will never actually reach the end of. I have accepted that but it does make my brain a little crazy. <br />
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Once I leave work I generally probably have some sort of school work I should attend to. If it's not reading it's a paper, or articles, or presentations or a test. You get the idea. I read and write all day at work and then I read an write at home and if I have free time I am always trying to squeeze in either more reading that is also in relation to school and I feel will just help me be a better counselor OR I collapse on the couch and stare at The Real Housewives of Orange County for a hour while my brain does almost nothing. <br />
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It feels like I am either in full academic/psychology/behavioral health mode or my brain needs to completely escape. And this is frequently a problem. Because I find that my brain does not want to turn off. Sometimes I literally cannot sit still for a whole episode of the Housewives just because my brain is still too engaged. <br />
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My other thing I have been experiencing lately is this feeling that this schedule is relentless and never ending. Sometimes it really doesn't seem there will ever be a time in my life again that will involve free time of the sort of would like to find. Or vacations. I can't find the time to do so many things I would like to do because at least for the next year and 1/2, the time to do those things just doesn't exist. I know I will get through it. <br />
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Saving my mind right now is Duo Lingo. <br />
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<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-DkreSfeowwQ/VAJbrDkVFFI/AAAAAAAAN4s/bA7uHjMk-h4/s1600/duolingo.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-DkreSfeowwQ/VAJbrDkVFFI/AAAAAAAAN4s/bA7uHjMk-h4/s1600/duolingo.png" height="320" width="320" /></a></div>
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What the heck is Duolingo you may ask. Well it's a phone app on which you can practice language skills in several other languages and the best part is, it's free. </div>
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I learned some french in high school and college but I have never been proficient. I LOOOOOOOVE this app. When my brain can't turn off I just flip open this app and start practicing French and feel myself just completely in some sort of fantastic zen space. Sometimes I can't stop and I have to force myself to move on to other tasks. My french is getting so much better. Yesterday on NPR there was a press conference in french which they translated - but I understood well over 50% of it before the translation. It's awesome. </div>
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If you want to brush up on a language you once kinda sorta learned a little of or if you want to learn one you've never tried I highly recommend it. It's like playing a video game but it's not a waste of time. </div>
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<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-EWADNBCkEmA/VAJceNpaX2I/AAAAAAAAN5E/CzFu3eJLY6k/s1600/duolingo-screengrab.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-EWADNBCkEmA/VAJceNpaX2I/AAAAAAAAN5E/CzFu3eJLY6k/s1600/duolingo-screengrab.png" height="228" width="400" /></a></div>
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Also. I really want to go to France when I have a different situation wherein I can actually leave my house for an extended vacation at some point in the future. My goal is to go the year I turn 50. So learning French better feels like it is increasing my likelihood of having a better vacation. </div>
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Which brings me to my one other sanity saver which I've discussed before. Pinterest images of the places I'd like to go in France. </div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Neptune Fountain - Versailles</td></tr>
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But for now it's back to two papers I need to write. Bandanamomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00022192424529851823noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17774815.post-80375360541467165182014-07-20T13:26:00.001-07:002014-07-20T22:55:31.368-07:00Why I think it's still okay to tell people to "do what you love"<b><i>a short rant on something that's been bugging me for a while.</i></b>.. <br />
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Recently there have been a few articles, social media commentary, and some backlash in general on the idea of imparting advice to people that they should "do what you love and love what you do". The reasoning seems to be generally that it is a somewhat snotty idea that people actually have this as an option - that not all of us can be photographers, and film majors, and craft heirloom yak yarn on our wooden spindles while listening to indie folk rock and sipping on $8 Oprah Chai Tea Latte. Or something like that. I guess the idea is that only a privileged few get these sorts of options and it is both delusional, and unhelpful to suggest that everyone will have the economic freedom of choosing a career based on what you "love". Also, there seems to be a bit of a backlash based on the fact that "work" indeed involves (or should) actual "work" and that we should recognize and applaud those who do jobs no one "loves" particularly but which must need to be done because society would literally fall apart if everyone picked "twee" careers like costume design and hand blowing glass because where would we get garbage men?<br />
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Mkkkk<br />
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But I totally disagree. And the reason I totally disagree is that it sends a really dumb message to either young people feeling out their futures and to adults who want to go back to school or switch around what they are doing. The best advice by far is still, and probably always will be, do what you love. And the reason is relatively simple. If you do what you love you will likely be good at what you do. And if you do what you love you will likely be satisfied with your work. And as well you will likely excel beyond the other people who are also doing that thing - especially if they are not doing it because they love it. And the biggest reason is probably the dictum if you do what you love you actually work a lot harder but it won't seem so much like work, thereby, increasing your likelihood of further success.<br />
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The world is always going to be full of people who hate their jobs, are terrible at their jobs, do a job just for the paycheck, who can't keep a job to save their life, who are never satisfied and who feel totally stuck. And this is usually due to a variety of reasons and one of them is that they aren't doing what they love, they aren't working towards doing what they love, or they have no idea what they would love. It's not the only reason - there is some general other issues at place which of course sometimes is lack of opportunity, socioeconomic barriers, and other societal issues. And while this is always true in the MACRO, it is very rarely true in the MICRO. And by that I mean that I tell all my economically disadvantaged youth who I case manage to DO WHAT YOU LOVE. Because there is usually always some way to make that happen. I see talent and potential in almost everyone - and yet, very often they believe due to their circumstances, or poor advice their parents give them, or because they don't believe in themselves, that they may be stuck doing things that they don't want to do. Usually it is a lack of self esteem and the ability to believe in themselves.<br />
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I sometimes hear college educated people say "college isn't for everyone". I mean really? That sounds about as classicist as anything I've ever heard anyone say. It's not for everyone but it is for you right? In my job I very often get to see people's IQ scores. It is shocking to me how often some poor kid who is doing terrible in school and generally comes from a background where no one has gone to college and no one expects anything from this kid - how often these kids actually have a relatively high IQ score. These are kids who get told "college isn't for everyone" "school is hard and it's not for everybody".<br />
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It's probably true. School is not for everyone. Some people really do struggle with school. But often they have other talents and skills. It's totally cool if that talent is welding, cooking, dancing or a plethora of other things. Sometimes school is important and sometimes, less so. But learning your skill, craft, and honing your talent is always going to be important. <br />
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Someone is always going to be the dude who digs the ditches - either because that dude actually likes digging ditches or because that dude got stuck through a series of circumstances, digging ditches. Society is never going to just be full of people who play the lute and hand raise goats and make artisinal cheese. But gosh darn it if that's what you want to do, you should totally go for it. There are always going to be people who will just do a job for the paycheck.<br />
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And this is not to say that just because you decided to open up that little antique shop like you always wanted that it's not going to be work. It sure as heck is going to be work. Most jobs, no matter how much you like what you're doing, have acumen for it, or are otherwise suited for your career, will be <i>easy</i>. But it will be <i>easier,</i> than doing something you hate. The worst day at a job you're well suited for is better than the best day at a job you aren't. <br />
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I'm super glad that at the age of 46 I am working towards doing what I really want to do. It feels good even though it is a challenge. If I wasn't doing this I can think of at least 3 or 4 other things I also would have loved and probably could have done as well and all of them probably would have been challenging to obtain success at. But all of them would have been worth it.<br />
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Don't let anyone rain on your parade. Go do what you want, what you love, what interests you, what you're talented at, and what you feel like doing.<br />
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Jobs that I think I would have loved besides being a counselor:<br />
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art curation/art historian<br />
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<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-wwUZ0GkZLRE/U8wcFhxkyTI/AAAAAAAANq0/tzOD3bSuXHM/s1600/Dawsey-has-held-curatorial-posts-at-the-San-Francisco-Museum-of-Modern-Art-and-most-recently-at-the-Utah-Museum-of-Fine-Arts.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-wwUZ0GkZLRE/U8wcFhxkyTI/AAAAAAAANq0/tzOD3bSuXHM/s1600/Dawsey-has-held-curatorial-posts-at-the-San-Francisco-Museum-of-Modern-Art-and-most-recently-at-the-Utah-Museum-of-Fine-Arts.jpg" height="214" width="320" /></a></div>
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(this is Jill Dawsey, she's been a curator at the Utah Museum of Fine Arts, SF Museum of Modern Art and Museum of Contemporary Art San Diego.)</div>
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Interior Designer </div>
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<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-yheniwwZjRQ/U8wdThQdyVI/AAAAAAAANrA/QHNc-W3I_kI/s1600/mary-mcdonald-interior-designer-fabulous-after_contact.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-yheniwwZjRQ/U8wdThQdyVI/AAAAAAAANrA/QHNc-W3I_kI/s1600/mary-mcdonald-interior-designer-fabulous-after_contact.jpg" height="313" width="400" /></a></div>
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(I've said before I'd like to BE Mary Mcdonald, but if I can't actually be her, I think I also would have loved to be an interior designer who is as successful as her)</div>
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boutique owner</div>
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<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-I7ToA7VbKIE/U8weMqmkgeI/AAAAAAAANrI/Z-ofJ2PSoKQ/s1600/georganne.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-I7ToA7VbKIE/U8weMqmkgeI/AAAAAAAANrI/Z-ofJ2PSoKQ/s1600/georganne.jpg" height="400" width="320" /> </a></div>
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(Georgeann Bryant owns local Frances Boutique, it is absolutely charming and lovely and when I was younger I used to think I would love owning a boutique - it still sounds appealing, but I think the "business" part of it might be challenging! Even still, if you have the right personality and skill set, this would be an awesome career)</div>
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Fashion Editor </div>
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(well we can't all be Grace Coddington, but what an awesome job!)</div>
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Advertising: </div>
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(and we can't all be Don Draper either - BUT, I often believe I could have been good at a career in advertising or marketing, I even like the idea of being the person who does the focus groups and travels all over doing that)<br />
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Jury consultant: <br />
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(this always appealed to me I think for the same reason psychology and counseling appeals to me - but in this job you're just figuring people out and making hunches about behavior rather than dealing with them directly. I still think I'm really good at being able to do this. I can predict people's behavior pretty accurately)</div>
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Writer</div>
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<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-i6swqIN4Few/U8wjLG-vfRI/AAAAAAAANr8/emnNaLmagA8/s1600/VirginiaWoolf.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-i6swqIN4Few/U8wjLG-vfRI/AAAAAAAANr8/emnNaLmagA8/s1600/VirginiaWoolf.jpg" height="320" width="234" /></a></div>
(when I was young I really only wanted to be a writer more than anything in the world.)<br />
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English or French Teacher:<br />
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<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-peuMDV3cFFk/U8wjvZxawOI/AAAAAAAANsE/f8vDTUvu0bI/s1600/article-2127903-128A5F2A000005DC-9_634x552.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-peuMDV3cFFk/U8wjvZxawOI/AAAAAAAANsE/f8vDTUvu0bI/s1600/article-2127903-128A5F2A000005DC-9_634x552.jpg" height="278" width="320" /></a></div>
(last, but certainly not least, I did consider becoming an English or French teacher - I think I would have liked it and been pretty good at it too)<br />
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All of the careers I've listed are careers someone might try to talk a person out of for a variety of reasons, either because they seem too hard to achieve, or it's too competitive, or the pay isn't particularly good. There's always a downside it seems to everything and if there is, you can be sure people will feel they have to let you know what that downside is.<br />
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But take heart - there are plenty of upsides! Decide what you most want and then work hard for it. SOMEBODY has to do the job or have the career you're dreaming of - it might as well be YOU.<br />
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Bandanamomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00022192424529851823noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17774815.post-82343428982327156432014-06-01T19:56:00.000-07:002014-06-01T19:56:00.144-07:00This is a Public Service Announcementthis week a saw girl with a really giant sign on her forearm that said REPENT, a girl with a purple unicorn, a teen with a saying that was misspelled ("tomarrow may never come"), and a man with a spider web on his face. so this post is a public service announcement to assist people looking to get a tattoo. <br />
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first off, I don't really want you to get a tattoo. not for some of the reasons you might think, but mostly because I think it's really really hard to know that you are actually going to want something permanent like that. I have art at home that I love, but I am not even sure I'll keep all of it forever you know? so there's that. And then the other thing is there are so many terrible tattoos in the world and I just feel that you don't need to contribute to that trend. and even though you don't think you are going to chose a bad tattoo - well, I am worried that you might anyway. and you won't even know it. not right away. today i saw a woman with elvis on her arm. I'm sure it seemed like a good idea at the time but I can assure you that it was not. so mostly probably if you are thinking of getting a tattoo - maybe don't.
but if I can't talk you out of it. here are some that I approve of. I know how condescending and awful that makes me sound. but I don't really care. I just really want to see a world with less bad tattoos. maybe that means no tattoo for you. maybe that means at least get something good if you're going to do it. k?
ok.<br />
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you know - more like this...<br />
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<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-RNz2V-Qp3LQ/U4viYRhwtOI/AAAAAAAANpQ/1kxbfD3vUc0/s1600/56d584cb50c04f5baebe7e561b49216c.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-RNz2V-Qp3LQ/U4viYRhwtOI/AAAAAAAANpQ/1kxbfD3vUc0/s1600/56d584cb50c04f5baebe7e561b49216c.jpg" height="320" width="246" /></a><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-xs4XZ18tMKg/U4vkChR-KfI/AAAAAAAANpk/DrCPN_kegpU/s1600/0d18dbe81100cfd1ed38dd6f693961de.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-xs4XZ18tMKg/U4vkChR-KfI/AAAAAAAANpk/DrCPN_kegpU/s1600/0d18dbe81100cfd1ed38dd6f693961de.jpg" height="272" width="320" /></a></div>
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And less like this...<br />
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<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-QsMD1fnMR1w/U4vkA-iVTPI/AAAAAAAANpc/hhmLf36SvFs/s1600/5419c67ef923b93213aaefdc92b71fa9.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-QsMD1fnMR1w/U4vkA-iVTPI/AAAAAAAANpc/hhmLf36SvFs/s1600/5419c67ef923b93213aaefdc92b71fa9.jpg" height="320" width="220" /></a></div>
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See also <a href="http://bandanamom.blogspot.com/2012/11/my-favorite-literary-tattoos.html" target="_blank"><span style="color: magenta;">HERE</span></a><br />
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that is all.<br />
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<br />Bandanamomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00022192424529851823noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17774815.post-67320040033524818252014-05-03T18:18:00.002-07:002014-05-03T18:18:32.608-07:00How Pinterest Saves My Sanity (and some other stuff) Remember when I used to blog like, oh I don't know maybe 10 times a month or something? It's a vague faraway thing - but I kinda remember it. <br />
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Dudes. I really like to write. I like to blog. Maybe someday, but that someday is not now. Actually sometimes I think if I can just get through school maybe I will write like for reals, just because I do love it and I keep imagining a world where I craft expertly perfect sentences that convey all kinds of intriguing and irresistibly genius thoughts. <br />
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I think sometimes my problem is that I am way too interested in way too many things. And right now I basically have time for like one of those things. And I feel like my brain is getting stuffed with all kinds of useful things in that one area - but I feel kinda sad sometimes that my brain does not know much else.<br />
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Things I love and that skitter around in my brain seeking attention:<br />
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Photography<br />
Films<br />
Reading/Books<br />
Interior Design<br />
Architecture<br />
Friends<br />
Food<br />
New Restaurants<br />
Old Restaurants<br />
Road Trips<br />
Travel<br />
Foreign Languages<br />
Politicky stuff<br />
Kids<br />
Ideas<br />
The BEACH<br />
water<br />
grass<br />
art<br />
museums<br />
dusk<br />
sunsets<br />
getting lost<br />
figuring stuff out<br />
driving<br />
driving at night<br />
wandering<br />
journals<br />
poems<br />
needlework<br />
quilting<br />
pop culture<br />
warm air<br />
dogs<br />
connections<br />
big ideas<br />
little ideas<br />
white on white on white<br />
bold colors<br />
dirt<br />
things that smell awesome<br />
curated stuff<br />
colors on colors on colors<br />
spiritual enlightenment<br />
comfort<br />
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I do think sometimes that I have a possible tiny bit of adult ADD - because my brain has a hard time turning off.<br />
almost every night before bed I have a ritual where I can look through my pinterest feed and categorize and chose things I love. It is hard to explain how gratifying this can be.<br />
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<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-i_6RdgTy4Ls/U2WLrreOi_I/AAAAAAAANjs/JHkdFUom4AQ/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+5.22.12+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-i_6RdgTy4Ls/U2WLrreOi_I/AAAAAAAANjs/JHkdFUom4AQ/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+5.22.12+PM.png" height="300" width="640" /></a></div>
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I may not have that many people who religiously follow this blog, but I have 1500 people who follow me on Pinterest. Which is kind of weird and gratifying at the same time. At least when I feel like I don't have time to really convey my thoughts anymore, there are some people out there who look through their pinterest and by seeing some of the things I pin, are understanding a little bit about what I am thinking about at the moment. </div>
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I'm not sure what this all means - from a psychological standpoint. But I spend all day thinking from a psychological standpoint - so I'm not going to overanalyze it too much. </div>
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I'm just going to keep pinning for now. </div>
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<a href="http://www.pinterest.com/bandanamom/" target="_blank">You can follow all or some of my boards here</a></div>
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(and I'm going to go ahead and pat myself on the back for some of my clever captions on my boards - because sometimes you might as well pat yourself on the back)</div>
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<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-ziQj8d5MGUU/U2WPCXz9IHI/AAAAAAAANj4/HfJrM9vT-Fk/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+4.56.12+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-ziQj8d5MGUU/U2WPCXz9IHI/AAAAAAAANj4/HfJrM9vT-Fk/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+4.56.12+PM.png" height="316" width="640" /></a></div>
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These are clothes or people I find ridiculously beautiful and believe they need to be admired the same way you might admire a work of art</div>
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<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-T2JtIir6huA/U2WPFPo8XgI/AAAAAAAANkA/xg20GEBTJCI/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+4.56.58+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-T2JtIir6huA/U2WPFPo8XgI/AAAAAAAANkA/xg20GEBTJCI/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+4.56.58+PM.png" height="320" width="640" /></a></div>
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I may not be able to wear some of these IRL - but in your fantasy life you can wear anything you want</div>
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<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-ldYy2HpaOPM/U2WPHiix5eI/AAAAAAAANkI/MdsWorhj4qc/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+4.57.43+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-ldYy2HpaOPM/U2WPHiix5eI/AAAAAAAANkI/MdsWorhj4qc/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+4.57.43+PM.png" height="320" width="640" /></a></div>
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I never went to prom. this should explain all you need to know about this board. </div>
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<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-b9vO_GGzgOk/U2WPKZ6-47I/AAAAAAAANkQ/rZi5HHd6GQ8/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+4.58.19+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-b9vO_GGzgOk/U2WPKZ6-47I/AAAAAAAANkQ/rZi5HHd6GQ8/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+4.58.19+PM.png" height="323" width="640" /></a></div>
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sometimes you see something and just sticks with you, and later, you can call it up as "happy place"</div>
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<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-D1G3-g9QarU/U2WPP7yendI/AAAAAAAANkY/jyL_eC_Q-rs/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+4.59.09+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-D1G3-g9QarU/U2WPP7yendI/AAAAAAAANkY/jyL_eC_Q-rs/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+4.59.09+PM.png" height="328" width="640" /></a></div>
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architecture or architectural details I think are swanky. and bee tee dubs, don't be surprised if I try a pink door someday. don't say I didn't warn you or something. </div>
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<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-9MQA7LyVIPE/U2WPU7H8TfI/AAAAAAAANkg/p2GdWuP_i7Q/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+4.58.45+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-9MQA7LyVIPE/U2WPU7H8TfI/AAAAAAAANkg/p2GdWuP_i7Q/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+4.58.45+PM.png" height="330" width="640" /></a></div>
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Oh sigh. House Interiors are my drug of choice. </div>
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<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-WwlpPkU-VMA/U2WPZmFr4mI/AAAAAAAANko/NWV_c3qFXFM/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+4.59.33+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-WwlpPkU-VMA/U2WPZmFr4mI/AAAAAAAANko/NWV_c3qFXFM/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+4.59.33+PM.png" height="322" width="640" /></a></div>
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sometimes I get a genius idea for a room color scheme </div>
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<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-iidDr3fxLd4/U2WPdVtiW0I/AAAAAAAANkw/8ItxusJ50rc/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+4.59.52+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-iidDr3fxLd4/U2WPdVtiW0I/AAAAAAAANkw/8ItxusJ50rc/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+4.59.52+PM.png" height="328" width="640" /></a></div>
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lights are just cool, i wish i had more carefully chosen the ones in my house currently, so i like to imagine how i will change things if given the chance</div>
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<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-XW8As6bRR-w/U2WPhcmwIBI/AAAAAAAANk4/3leMa_aqpE8/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+5.00.16+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-XW8As6bRR-w/U2WPhcmwIBI/AAAAAAAANk4/3leMa_aqpE8/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+5.00.16+PM.png" height="320" width="640" /></a></div>
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art i would like to own, or see, or admire or think about or whatever</div>
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<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-PpDZT_-xE6A/U2WPrQHc_nI/AAAAAAAANlI/qDs3D1ScJqo/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+5.00.36+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-PpDZT_-xE6A/U2WPrQHc_nI/AAAAAAAANlI/qDs3D1ScJqo/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+5.00.36+PM.png" height="324" width="640" /></a></div>
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stuff related to movies or music i love </div>
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<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-6taVuZgv8wo/U2WPzg-R15I/AAAAAAAANlg/624_8FQtYaA/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+5.02.13+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-6taVuZgv8wo/U2WPzg-R15I/AAAAAAAANlg/624_8FQtYaA/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+5.02.13+PM.png" height="322" width="640" /></a></div>
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sometimes I dream of getting away - or going back </div>
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<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-1b4uLRGbks0/U2WP2buC5-I/AAAAAAAANlo/p3tkXsldWvI/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+5.01.15+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-1b4uLRGbks0/U2WP2buC5-I/AAAAAAAANlo/p3tkXsldWvI/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+5.01.15+PM.png" height="324" width="640" /></a></div>
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I like to torture myself with lists and lists of books to read when I already dont have time </div>
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<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-XQ8WrpAp8gs/U2WP6Vrnh6I/AAAAAAAANl4/iEZHVBIQWQI/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+5.05.05+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-XQ8WrpAp8gs/U2WP6Vrnh6I/AAAAAAAANl4/iEZHVBIQWQI/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+5.05.05+PM.png" height="342" width="640" /></a></div>
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its' creepy slightly yes. </div>
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<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-WMhYcTHcp9Q/U2WP8A6W3-I/AAAAAAAANmA/cohbp5UolfY/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+5.05.49+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-WMhYcTHcp9Q/U2WP8A6W3-I/AAAAAAAANmA/cohbp5UolfY/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+5.05.49+PM.png" height="336" width="640" /></a></div>
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I never tire of looking for accessories i may or may not buy</div>
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<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-OPkf7JeB3Fw/U2WP-CLTuBI/AAAAAAAANmI/mUk_m9HgcqE/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+5.06.04+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-OPkf7JeB3Fw/U2WP-CLTuBI/AAAAAAAANmI/mUk_m9HgcqE/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+5.06.04+PM.png" height="322" width="640" /></a></div>
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actually I have bought almost every perfume I've ever pinned because I pin it after smelling it as a reminder to myself to buy it or ask for it. it's a good strategy </div>
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<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-cpjY3BOvzg0/U2WQEGggDWI/AAAAAAAANmY/WxLthDg2g4k/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+5.06.26+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-cpjY3BOvzg0/U2WQEGggDWI/AAAAAAAANmY/WxLthDg2g4k/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+5.06.26+PM.png" height="322" width="640" /></a></div>
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sometimes I care about new make up ideas </div>
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<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-eQR4nBtKCeA/U2WQGQSYdzI/AAAAAAAANmg/VDYAAJyHORo/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+5.06.48+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-eQR4nBtKCeA/U2WQGQSYdzI/AAAAAAAANmg/VDYAAJyHORo/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+5.06.48+PM.png" height="322" width="640" /></a></div>
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I'm not a natural red head, but I try </div>
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<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-E3UAaiGZZ7g/U2WQH5YxAwI/AAAAAAAANmo/9n_5Au3eP5g/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+5.07.13+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-E3UAaiGZZ7g/U2WQH5YxAwI/AAAAAAAANmo/9n_5Au3eP5g/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+5.07.13+PM.png" height="326" width="640" /></a></div>
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things that are nostalgic, but weirdly, usually end up in my decor somehow after I pin them </div>
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<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-iiGbAHqudHo/U2WQJ0pmWhI/AAAAAAAANmw/EUyGny95Kyc/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+5.41.43+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-iiGbAHqudHo/U2WQJ0pmWhI/AAAAAAAANmw/EUyGny95Kyc/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+5.41.43+PM.png" height="320" width="640" /></a></div>
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you'd be surprised how many times I wander over to this board to bouy up my spirits </div>
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<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-2CYDnpgL-1I/U2WQLgOY_4I/AAAAAAAANm4/S921_hbe7CI/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+5.42.03+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-2CYDnpgL-1I/U2WQLgOY_4I/AAAAAAAANm4/S921_hbe7CI/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+5.42.03+PM.png" height="320" width="640" /></a></div>
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children are adorbs and so are there clothes, plus i figure someday, grandkids </div>
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<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-uk2KGQ4s6V4/U2WQNMUlaNI/AAAAAAAANnA/PQpZ-hftDSE/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+5.42.20+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-uk2KGQ4s6V4/U2WQNMUlaNI/AAAAAAAANnA/PQpZ-hftDSE/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+5.42.20+PM.png" height="324" width="640" /></a></div>
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sometimes I show things on this board to my talented daughter and she actually creates them in her advanced ceramics class and brings them home </div>
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sometimes I PRETEND that I cook</div>
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<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-FsQpibrWbdg/U2WQU-dWVMI/AAAAAAAANnQ/exgN8mTPVpM/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+5.43.12+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-FsQpibrWbdg/U2WQU-dWVMI/AAAAAAAANnQ/exgN8mTPVpM/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+5.43.12+PM.png" height="296" width="640" /></a></div>
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I may never have to plan another wedding but who cares. women have been buying stupid wedding magazines since the dawn of time and we will keep on doing it as long as there are pretty flowers and dresses and general gorgeousness involved. if we don't use it ourselves we will use it to judge someone else's wedding and why they did it all wrong. </div>
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<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-_i0XpU87q_4/U2WQWLpiBRI/AAAAAAAANnY/vLhhXJzZ3Ig/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+5.43.28+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-_i0XpU87q_4/U2WQWLpiBRI/AAAAAAAANnY/vLhhXJzZ3Ig/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+5.43.28+PM.png" height="316" width="640" /></a></div>
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I don't know. there's something so appealing about this stuff</div>
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I like parties dude. </div>
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<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-LUsVhUuCqDo/U2WQZlELWrI/AAAAAAAANno/xbWejqp3mUo/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+5.44.00+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-LUsVhUuCqDo/U2WQZlELWrI/AAAAAAAANno/xbWejqp3mUo/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+5.44.00+PM.png" height="308" width="640" /></a></div>
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If I am being kind to myself I might consider some of these things as healthy options </div>
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I dig mens fashion almost as much as womens. maybe more so sometimes. </div>
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children's lit is the best </div>
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I consider chairs i can't afford just for the hell of it, and just in case I find a good knock off or can offer advice to someone who can afford the chairs.<br />
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<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-4eKUG9QMKwo/U2WQiYVVGkI/AAAAAAAANoQ/XEY--U4XTEI/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+5.45.26+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-4eKUG9QMKwo/U2WQiYVVGkI/AAAAAAAANoQ/XEY--U4XTEI/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+5.45.26+PM.png" height="310" width="640" /></a></div>
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when I am an old lady I will return to stitching the heck out of stuff for the pure zen pleasure of it all </div>
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<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-_WjLkxsSZsA/U2WQj-NR35I/AAAAAAAANoY/FLfNZcReBxE/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+5.48.48+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-_WjLkxsSZsA/U2WQj-NR35I/AAAAAAAANoY/FLfNZcReBxE/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-05-03+at+5.48.48+PM.png" height="314" width="640" /></a></div>
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sometimes I imagine I will buy the perfect gift for people. then I get too busy and shop at the last minute and suck at gift giving. but I like the ideas. </div>
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I know people say this all the time - but generally speaking, I would be such an awesome wealthy person. I would not buy frivolous crap or blow all my money on a really expensive car or a too big house or the wrong kinds of stuff. </div>
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I know all the right kinds of stuff. </div>
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Bandanamomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00022192424529851823noreply@blogger.com2